Flirting doesn’t come naturally to every girl. Especially as society has been telling us that it’s the guy who has to make the first move. But, as Bob Dylan crooned, “The times – they are a-changin’.” In 2018, there is no taboo against the girl making the first move or being more active in the courting process. If you are unsure of how to flirt with a guy and break the ice, or how to respond to their flirting, try a few of these tips! What’s the worst that could happen?
1. Breaking The Ice
You don’t want to walk straight up to a guy you’re interested in and just start talking, right? However, this isn’t far from what you should be doing. There are several ways you can do this without reeking of desperation. There’s the classic move of bumping into them ‘accidentally’ (but on purpose). That way you come off as social but don’t give off the vibe that you have a huge crush on them. You ought to save expressing interest for a while.
The first thing you say can be very important. You don’t want to seem awkward unless you’re doing it in a cute way. Have a few jokes in mind, either good ones or ones that are so bad that they’re good. Avoid pick-up lines unless it’s clear to them that you’re using them intentionally to be cheesy.
If you’re low on confidence, warm up to a song that really gets you pumped up. Listen to it before meeting the guy, and you’ll be able to make advances to even the hottest of guys! You might also want to approach the guy with a friend and introduce them, keeping it casual all around.
2. Getting The Guy Interested
Once the guy knows who you are, it’s time to get them interested! Smile and wave to them when you pass by them. Don’t make excessive conversation, but make your presence felt. Have little excuses to talk to them from time to time. For example, keeping some chewing gum with you and offering it to them is one of the best ways to flirt with a guy.
Additionally, let the guy catch you looking at them – looking but not staring. When they make eye contact, give them a smile. This will bring them to you instead of you going towards them. When they talk to you, make sure to keep them engaged and show that you are paying attention. Little verbal cues such as “yeah” and “mm-hmm” can be all that it takes. You can also compliment them on their clothes and ask about them. They’ll notice that you noticed and be pleased.
3. Playing Hard To Get
This is a tough one to balance. Playing hard to get can sometimes give off mixed signals. You want to ignore them for some time, but not long enough that they think you are not interested. Show that you have your own personal life but also converse every now and again to show you have space for them in your life. Don’t answer every question that the guy answers, make them work for it. Guys enjoy a good chase and this will keep them engaged.
This is an art that you have to practice, and it cannot be broken down into specific pointers. While maintaining a safe distance, you still want them to make sure they consider you a suitable date. After all, the last thing you want is to get friend-zoned!
4. Getting The Date
If it comes down to you having to ask the guy out, it isn’t a bad thing. Slip them a handwritten note asking them out – it’s a lot more endearing than a text message. You can text them out of the blue to meet impromptu – not a date per se, but just a meeting. For example, you can casually text them saying you have a craving for ice cream and ask if they’re interested in getting some. This could lead to your first date.
In the age of social media, you have a lot more options for contacting them. You can publicly comment on one of their posts or photos, and then follow it up with a direct message asking if they want to hang out.
5. Playing It Cool
Guys don’t like clingy girls. After your first date, don’t immediately get hung up on meeting again, or constantly call or text them. Give them some space and let them come back to you. Make sure they know you had a good time but don’t sound overly attached. Be sportive and make fun of them. Guys love a little banter. Make them nervous a little by allowing them to wonder about you. If they text, pretend not to have stored their number. When they re-introduce themselves, tell them you knew all along. A little bit of confusion makes a good base for a romance and is a classic example of how to flirt with a guy over text and keep them interested.
6. The First Kiss
You aren’t likely to kiss the guy on the first date. But if you do, more power to you! So, don’t fret. However, if it does come later on, that’s alright too. At the end of the date, break eye contact slowly and stare at their lips. The guy will know you’re interested in a tiny kiss. Draw attention to your lips, say, by putting on some chapstick. Make sure you are completely casual and breezy.
7. Leave Them Wanting More
It’s often said amongst guys that the chase is better than the catch. Getting completely involved and serious soon after the first few days will take the magic out of what could turn out to be a long and loving relationship. You always have to keep them wanting more. Sometimes, when they are about to kiss you, lean in but turn away. Just say you had a nice time and leave it at that. Put some perfume on the back of your neck – let them remember your scent. Smell is one of the most powerful ways of forming a memory, and memorable is what you certainly want to be.
Navigating the terrain of romance and relationships can be difficult in the beginning, but once you are comfortable with yourself, you will find that it’s a lot easier than what you previously thought. Little tips go a long way in building your confidence when it comes to flirting.
However, be warned – not every guy is going to fall for these tactics. Sometimes, it’s important to drop all pretence and just be yourself. Your crush will give you unconscious clues to what they’re feeling, and all you have to do is go on this feedback. We hope you get together with the guy that’s on your mind!
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