How To Apologize To Your Boyfriend

Written by Harini Natarajan , Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner

Let’s face it – we all commit mistakes. However, ignoring the blunders and not accepting the slip-ups can strain a romantic relationship. Although it is not always easy to admit that you are wrong, a heartfelt apology can be a powerful way to show good intentions. Acknowledge that your partner is hurt by your words and come up with a sincere ‘sorry’. In this article, we have compiled the 7 best ways to apologize to your boyfriend for being rude or hurting him. Scroll down to explore what they are.

7 Ways To Apologize To Your Boyfriend For Hurting His Feelings

1. Check Your Tone

Check Your Tone


Words matter, and so do your tone, volume, and body language. The way you apologize can make or break your relationship. So, you need to check your tone while apologizing to your partner. If the apology doesn’t sound sincere, it can complicate the situation and lead to an adverse outcome.

Try not to escalate matters by yelling or talking in a loud, sarcastic tone. It is both annoying and insulting, which does not resolve anything. Even the best words will not be meaningful if delivered with an angry look, rolling eyes, and lack of sincerity. If you do not mean to apologize, it is better to move back rather than make things worse. Remember, your boyfriend can easily identify if you render an empty apology, which can break his trust.

2. Cool Down Before Apologizing

You may utter words in the heat of the moment that you do not mean. In such a scenario, words like “I am sorry” don’t sound even half good when followed by “you are not trying to understand my views.” So, take some time to cool down and think through your feelings before apologizing. Do not be hasty; otherwise, it can simply mean you want to bypass the tension in your relationship.

3. Take Responsibility Of Your Actions

Make your apology crystal clear and show regret that he has been wronged. Be accountable for your actions, and don’t try to minimize, justify, or share the blame. This is your apology, so focus on what you did wrong.

Get to the point straightway and open up about your remorse and dedication to heal the wound. You can use sentences like “I realize I hurt and misunderstood you”. Add the specifics of what actually hurt him and what you will do to fix the issue or prevent a repeat.

4. Respect And Understand His Feelings

Respect And Understand His Feelings


You cannot expect your boyfriend to forgive you immediately and accept your apology on the spot. He might need some time to heal and unload his hurtful feelings. Try to understand why your boyfriend is angry at you and allow him some ‘me’ time to vent his frustration and disappointment.

Don’t demand or expect forgiveness – at least not right away. Otherwise, he may clam up and avoid listening to you. Instead of putting it on him, respect and understand his perspective. Instead of nagging, “please forgive me”, say, “I hope you can forgive me at some point.” Focus on what you can control, and listen patiently if he wants to talk.

5. Do Not Give Excuses

Show that you are sorry and follow through your promises. If you are justifying your behavior, it indicates you are not ready to apologize. Your actions are nothing but a ploy to earn back his good graces rather than true feelings and expressions of regret.

If you have offered a remedy with your apology, be sure you are willing to back it up with devoted, careful actions. Your apology is incomplete without a significant behavior change. Every time you make the same apology and try to normalize such acts, it will become less believable and acceptable for your boyfriend.

6. Discuss The Issue In Detail

When someone is hurt, their feelings are more profound than a mere reaction to careless words and thoughtless mistakes. For instance, your partner might get mad at you for being late for your date night, but that’s the surface issue. He probably feels you are ignoring him, he has stopped being your priority, or you are not putting enough effort to sustain the relationship.

So, instead of focusing on the apology or mistake, delve deeper into the matter and prioritize his feelings. A meaningless, hollow apology will save face and act as a momentary filler, but a true and sincere apology can be validating and help your boyfriend move on.

7. Work On Your Relationship

Work On Your Relationship


It requires a lot of hard work to maintain a healthy relationship. If both of you are fighting continuously where the problems seem endless and difficult to resolve, seek the help of a relationship counselor for better communication. Express how eager you are to work on your relationship and looking forward to fix the issues. Your boyfriend will appreciate how you are handling the mistakes and constructively resolving the matter.

The Takeaway

To err is human, but only responsible adults can own their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. Admit to your partner when you are wrong and be regretful of your actions. This will help keep the relationship healthy and happy based on mutual trust and understanding. Forge empathy and care, and try to understand the other person’s feelings better. Apologize with sincerity, show your boyfriend that you are working to fix the issue, and avoid further miscommunication.

Expert’s Answers For Readers’ Questions

How to apologize to your boyfriend for lying?

Figure out why you lied and take responsibility for your actions. Forgive yourself and try to heal from the guilt, shame, and remorse. Say sorry sincerely, and be prepared to listen to how your boyfriend feels. This way, you can work on your relationship and rebuild trust.

How do I apologize to my boyfriend after a breakup?

Explain to your partner why you did it and never ask them to start a relationship again. Apologize if you were at fault and acknowledge what you did and the impact it had. Try to make him feel safe, validated, and inclined to keep listening.

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