How To Be A Good Mother – 25 Qualities

With the right amount of discipline and adoration, every mother can be her child's idol.

Reviewed by Sarah Kenville, MA (Marriage and Family Therapy) Sarah Kenville Sarah KenvilleMA (Marriage and Family Therapy) facebook_iconinsta_icon
Written by , BSc Reshma Latif BSc linkedin_icon Experience: 5 years
Edited by , MA (English Literature) Madhumati Chowdhury MA (English Literature) linkedin_icon Experience: 7 years
Fact-checked by , Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
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Every mother follows the parenting style she thinks is best for her children, but there are certain general qualities you can adopt to win the title of ‘best mother’. Innumerable innate traits are considered here, and many of these characteristics and styles can be acquired to ensure your child-rearing capability as an individual. From providing adequate breathing space and privacy to trusting your coaching and allowing them to follow their paths and ideals, here are the top 25 qualities you need to ensure you are the best version of yourself for your beloved children and family.

How To Be A Good Mother – 25 Qualities

1. Be The Ultimate Idol

You are the first person your child will look up to, so ensure you are strong enough to guide them. Always put on a brave face to give them strength, even in difficult situations.

2. Give Unconditional Love

Mother and daughter sitting lovingly and reading a card.
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There will always be times when our children don’t meet our expectations or we instantly feel disappointed in them for whatever trivial reason. Don’t let this hinder showing your love for them. Empathize with your children and bestow them with ultimate support and compassion in all their decisions.

3. Always Be Patient

Being patient is one of the top traits to adopt if you are a new mother. Always stay patient with your child and be accepting of their behavior. Try to understand where they are coming from before bursting out in anger. Patience will also aid in child development and child care as it will allow you and your child to understand the aspect of a slow pace and how to work things out gently and slowly.

4. Maintain Respect

Every individual deserves respect regardless of their age. You might end up clashing on various topics and beliefs but don’t let that abstain you from giving respect to your child and hearing their opinions.

5. Be Stern

There will be times when you must be slightly strict with your children, which is necessary to guide them. Don’t mindlessly give in to their desires and requests in the name of love. Sometimes motherly love can turn into over-pampering which can negatively affect your child by making them unnecessarily demanding and hindering their potential and capabilities. Give your children critical motherly advices from time to time to build a strong character in them.

6. Emphasize Self-Care

Three female friends spending time together.
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While being a mother is a 24-hour job, it doesn’t mean you should neglect yourself. Make sure to take time for yourself and take adequate breaks; after all, a happy mom equals happy kids.

protip_icon Quick Tip
As a natural motherly instinct, women tend to give their all when caring for their children, but this can be detrimental to their physical and mental health. So, ask for help when needed. You can request a family member to babysit for a day or divide the chores to reduce the burden.

7. Spread Positivity

A positive and lively environment helps nurture the children and promotes qualities like resilience and optimism. Take part in their interests and always cheer them on in their hobbies.

8. Open Communication

Mother and child having a conversation.
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Always maintain a transparent relationship with your children and allow them to share their opinions and ideals. Don’t hesitate to discuss various taboo topics like sex with them and ensure they are aware of the outside world to be able to make rational decisions on their own.

9. Be Supportive

Regardless of their personality and gender, always be supportive of their dreams and decisions. Always give motherly support to your kids, which is extremely crucial for their future. Also remember that while you can offer your opinion, never demotivate them or give negative criticism.

10. Be Approachable

Children should never hesitate to approach their parents, especially their mothers. Present yourself as a warm and approachable person and allow your children to come to you whenever in doubt or trouble instead of hiding their mistakes and feeling a sense of fear towards you.

11. Build Trust

Build unshakable trust with your children to maintain a happy and healthy relationship. Guiding them in the right direction is essential, but building trust makes them more independent and better decision makers. It takes motherly wisdom to gain the trust of your growing children so that they share every little thing with their mother.

12. Be Concise In Your Speech

Children, especially younger children, find it easier to grasp and understand crisp instructions. Motherly guidance helps them take small but firm steps in life, but make sure not to over-explain. Leave something for them to explore and realize.

13. Follow Your Intuition

Sometimes, it’s best to follow your heart and gut feeling before making any decision regarding your child. No mother is handed parenting guidelines or a book to swear by, so act on what you think would be ideal and suitable for your child.

14. Show Empathy

Being empathic is a vital motherly role in proper parenting. You can emphasize in various ways: for instance, respecting their unique personalities and showing genuine interest in their activities and likings.

15. Be Attentive

Mother pays attention to kid while working.
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While taking breaks is non-negotiable, don’t let this turn into complete negligence. You shouldn’t compromise your child for work and let them roam around without parental supervision. Motherly care in all forms is crucial, and being attentive to your child’s behavior is the first thing to ensure that they won’t follow wrong guidance and adopt rebellious behavior.

Geeta, a blogger shares her experience of learning to be a new mom. She shares how her little one has changed her over time in 3 years. She wrote, “I try to listen to my toddler “Vyom”, attentively and with understanding, even though his language skills are still developing. I also remain calm when giving him medicine, using storytelling as a way to make his experience more enjoyable (i).”

16. Be Authentic

Every mother is different and knows what’s best for her children. Don’t compare yourself with others, and be your genuine self. Be confident in yourself, focus on your strengths as a mother, and truly believe in your decision.

17. Stay Humble

If you ever find yourself on the wrong side of the situation and need to apologize, don’t hesitate. Teaching your children that it is crucial to apologize when you are wrong is extremely important and is only obeyed when done by their ultimate role model – their mother.

18. Make Children Independent

Mother and child cleaning together
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Constantly catering to their needs and wants will only result in extreme dependency and promote separation anxiety in your absence. Instead, don’t always be around them and even give minimal tasks they can carry out effortlessly.

19. Give Personal Space

Everyone requires privacy, and surely no one appreciates toxic intruding behavior. Ensure you don’t fall into that category just because you wish to guarantee your child’s safety and keep them away from delinquency. Your child might feel uncomfortable with your hovering or helicopter parenting style. It might also hinder them from being completely independent.

20. Avoid Negative Thoughts

With parenting comes immense responsibilities and pressure, so don’t be too hard on yourself and enjoy the whole process. Along with children, we also learn many things ourselves. You will often find yourself making mistakes but don’t let them create self-doubt, overwhelm you, and question your parenting style.

21. Maintain A Routine

Mother helping the child study well.
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Staying consistent and following a daily routine will help the children fall into proper discipline and understand the value of time. Prepare a weekly or daily schedule for your child beforehand. For instance, wake them up at a fixed time, do not let homework or screen time overlap, and introduce some mother and child special bonding sessions.

protip_icon Quick Tip
While daily routine is important, a strict mundane schedule can easily bore children. Make sure to spice things up occasionally and incorporate fun activities like finger painting or building blocks.

22. Be Forgiving

As the adult in the situation, you have to act like one, so don’t hold any grudges or be stubborn in your ideals. Motherly affection is the key to understanding that children will make mistakes, which is a given, but you must be forgiving and gently make them understand their faults.

23. Give Compliments

It’s a motherly responsibility to build your kid’s confidence. A big self-esteem and confidence booster is to simply shower your kids with compliments. It will not only positively impact them but also make them understand the importance of self-love.

24. Be Reliable

A quality we don’t stress enough is being reliable, which is the number one characteristic every mother should have. Children tend to be more open and honest when they see their mother as a reliable figure who they can lean on in difficult times.

25. Be Interactive

Spending time with your children to help them complete their homework may not be enough. It is important to help them learn social skills. Spend quality time with them and connect through interactive and fun play sessions. These activities promote real bonding and creativity and help them develop self-control.

Infographic: 5 Good Qualities Every Mother Should Have

From being a constant pillar for the children to catering to their needs day and night, there are some qualities that come naturally to women, and the maternal instinct doubles when one becomes a mother. Despite carrying certain qualities that make every mother great, there are a few ways to become a better and, indeed, the best mother to one’s children.

Check out the infographic below and bookmark the top 5 qualities that are important to be a good mother.

5 good qualities every mother should have (infographic)

Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team

To Conclude

While all mothers are innately good, there are opportunities for you to hone your parenting skills and qualities. Parenting, in general, is a new and alien experience for every mother every time she gives birth. Even if this is not your first time being a mom, you can always adopt new qualities to be the best mother for your children. For a joyful and meaningful journey as your children grow into capable adults, don’t hesitate to try the above-mentioned tips and experience the true beauty of motherhood.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are some of the hardest things about being a mom?

Being a mother can take a toll on your physical health and be highly emotionally draining, so give yourself enough breaks and try to divide the work with your partner where possible.

How can I be a calm mom?

Five tips you can keep in mind to be a calm mom:

  • Find the reason behind your anger.
  • Leave the situation and give yourself a timeout.
  • Listen to your child first before sharing your opinion.
  • Consider the negative impact your anger can have on your children.
  • Ensure you are getting enough sleep, lack of sleep can make you irritable.

What makes a mother the happiest?

The practice of self-care and gaining access to those genuine moments of happiness are two characteristics that are consistently linked to being a “happy mom.”

What is “cold mother syndrome”?

Mothers who are emotionally distant or cold can be unresponsive to their kids’ needs. When interacting with the child, they might appear disengaged and uninterested, or they might outright reject the child’s advances. They might carry on behaving in this manner with grown children.

What can make a mom’s life easier?

To make cleaning up the house easier, try to reduce clutter. You must become an expert at meal preparation. Also, develop simple-to-follow procedures. Always ask for assistance and make use of modern technology. Most significantly, make your family’s schedule simpler.

What does an emotionally absent mother look like?

A mother who is emotionally distant is not fully present, especially in her child’s emotional needs. She might be feeling a little numb, depressed, overworked, and exhausted. Numerous of these mothers experienced severe under-mothering themselves and have no concept of what constitutes a close parent-child relationship.

What stresses moms out the most?

Lack of solitude and a sense of urgency to “get it all done.” Managing a work-life balance while being the main carer of the family often takes a heavy toll on their mental health.

What are some ways to support my child’s emotional well-being?

Talk to them often and pay close attention when they are expressing their problems. Be their friend and learn about their friends, school, and favorite films and cartoons. Encourage them to be honest so that you can comprehend their perspective.

What are some strategies for dealing with difficult behavior in my child?

Try to see the positive side of the negatives. You can instruct in good behavior. Always act in the manner that you expect. Additionally, create a code of conduct. Be clear in your communication.

How can I handle conflicts or disagreements with my child in a constructive way?

Talk to your child instead of reprimanding them. Teach them to respect one another’s viewpoints and engage in constructive dialogue despite disagreements in order to reveal the conflict’s true nature. Even if you ultimately disagree with your child, doing this can help them feel comfortable speaking up and expressing themselves without fear of reprimand or getting into a fight.

Key Takeaways

  • Being authoritative while also having a relaxed routine helps maintain a balanced lifestyle.
  • Building confidence and self-esteem from an early age is important.
  • Minimizing parent codependency is important to allow the child to grow into a self-reliant adult.
  • Being patient is the key to dealing with hyperactive and restless children.
  • Adequate breaks and self-care are also important and contribute to good parenting.
how to be a good mother

Image: Stable Diffusion/StyleCraze Design Team

Learn about different ways to be a better parent in this following video. From showering them with love to setting boundaries occasionally, the video will help you become the best parent.

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Sarah Kenville
Sarah KenvilleMA (Marriage and Family Therapy)
Sarah Kenville has a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy and a law degree. She has 8 years of experience and offers premarital counseling and relationship coaching to dating, engaged, newlywed, and same-sex couples.

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Reshma Latif
Reshma LatifBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Reshma is a content writer with a penchant for writing articles on relationships, makeup, and beauty. She started her writing career in 2007, soon after graduating from Mahatma Gandhi University. What began as a love for blogging bloomed into several freelancing opportunities over the years.

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Madhumati Chowdhury
Madhumati ChowdhuryAssociate Editor
Madhumati is an associate editor with seven years of professional experience. She has previously worked as an editor, proofreader, and a writer with various organizations, helping her navigate through the various facets of content creation and refinement with ease.

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Sneha Tete
Sneha TeteBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Sneha has a master's degree in Applied Linguistics from the University of Hyderabad, a professional Relationship Coach diploma, and over four years of experience in writing. She writes about relationships and lifestyle.Sneha began her career as an instructional designer, shifted to freelance technical and research writing, and self-published a novella on the theme of adolescent mental health.

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