24 Ways To Keep A Guy Interested & Secrets To Get Him Hooked

From having the confidence to dealing with past traumas, get a masterclass on captivating a man.

Reviewed by Rodolfo Parlati, Professional Life Coach Rodolfo Parlati Rodolfo ParlatiProfessional Life Coach facebook_iconlinkedin_iconyoutube_iconinsta_icon
Written by , Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Experience: 4 years
Edited by , MA (English) Subhrojyoti Mukherjee MA (English) linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
Fact-checked by , MA Gracia Odile MA linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years

If you are struggling to understand how to keep a guy interested in you, you are definitely not alone. This happens quite frequently during the dating stages but is fairly common in committed relationships as well. However, the solution is quite simple. Just like for women, small but genuine physical and emotional gestures matter for men. They value intimacy, good communication, and a high level of commitment. Of course, everybody has different expectations from an exclusive relationship. However, certain things are universal, most likely to please your loved one.

Also, always be respectful and avoid treating him as a personal object. Give them a sense of freedom and make them feel valued. Furthermore, it’s essential to not pass judgements about him and his personal traits. Always try to have an open dialogue with him and make him feel listened to and appreciated. In this article, we have listed a few secrets that can help keep your boyfriend hooked on you. Keep scrolling to know what they are.

How To Keep A Guy Interested: 24 Secrets To Get Him Hooked

1. Have Confidence In Yourself

Before you get into this whole process of keeping a man interested, ask yourself, are you confident in yourself? High self-confidence and self-esteem levels have been known to positively influence romantic relationships. A little bit of self-doubt is completely natural and something most people grapple with, but that does not mean that you question or second guess your every move. Be a confident woman! You should be able to have faith in your capabilities and relationship. Reflect back on the things that triggered the initial attraction between you two. They will likely work again, as many long-term relationships seem to get boring only when couples stop putting in the same effort they did at the start of the relationship or during the honeymoon phase. Engage in positive self-talk even if you may not believe it completely, and invest time and effort into yourself. Make sure to take time for yourself, do things you enjoy, pick up a new hobby, and appreciate the progress that you make in every sector of your life. Most importantly, worry less and enjoy the dating process! Believe in yourself and your relationship, do not give in to the moments of doubts, and your man will be forever engaged with you.

2. Do Not Be Too Clingy And Needy

When you have just recently fallen in love, it can get difficult to keep your hands off your partner. You may want to spend the majority of your day with him, do things together, constantly be in his presence, and have a great sex life. This may be romantic, but you must remember that both of you had a life before you got together. A healthy relationship is where both partners have enough time and space for themselves. Hence, if you are struggling to figure out ways to keep your man interested and rekindle physical attraction, remember this golden rule – give him and yourself space. This will also lead to personal growth and help you connect at a deeper level and allow him to feel your absence.

Megan, a blogger, shared how it is also important for you to prioritize yourself in life. She wrote, “He didn’t text me back for a week because he was busy with work, then just forgot. He hasn’t called me in a month because he’s tied up with a family issue. He hasn’t taken me on a real date in weeks, but that’s okay because I’m fine just chilling on the couch watching TV (i).”

3. But Do Not Be Too Aloof

The key is to strike the right balance between being there for him and giving him space. In your plan to give him space and keeping him interested, do not get very distant from him. The whole point of two people being in a romantic relationship and sharing their life is to be able to lean on each other in difficult times. Learn to analyze the situation and understand when he needs support. You can also discuss this with him to try and understand his needs.

4. Appreciate Him And Compliment Him

Woman giving a back hug to her partner to appreciate him and express herself
Image: Created with Dall.E

Who does not like being showered with compliments? It is high time we break away from the myth that only women like to hear compliments. Men like it too. Do not shy away from expressing your love for him and complimenting him on his personality, looks, intellectual capabilities, etc. Tell him how protective you feel around him as this will surely trigger his hero instinct and make him feel good about him. Praise him every now and then, and this simple yet effective way will keep him smitten with you for an eternity. It’s a clear sign you find him irresistible and attractive.

5. Keep It Light, Fun, And Playful

As you grow old and your relationship matures, the probability of both of you giving in to the pressures of life increases. You will have to constantly battle work issues, family problems, health complications, etc. Amidst all the stress and hard work, do not kill your inner child. Keep your sense of humor, as it will help you stay calm in tense situations. Remember to have fun and relieve stress by spending playful moments with each other. Simple things like chasing each other in the kitchen, trying gardening together, taking up an art project, etc. Whether you share a passion for music or travel, look for a common ground and enjoy doing such activities together that align with both of your interests. This will go a long way in keeping your man interested in you and valuing you for your ability to keep it light and lively throughout the dating process, resulting in a long-lasting relationship.

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You may also ask him out by surprising him with tickets to his favorite concert, stand-up comedy, or a game night and make him interested in you.

6. Be The Real You

The idea of being someone else and pretending to like things he likes may seem tempting but do not fall into this trap. It is nice to show interest in what he likes and put effort into understanding it better but pretending to love it as much as he does is highly unadvisable. It is important to be the real you and not pretend to keep him interested. This can help foster his emotional commitment and the guy can find it as an attractive quality in you.This may work momentarily, but it will be extremely difficult to keep up with it in the long run. Let him value you for your interests and choices.

7. Be Spontaneous

Are you constantly worrying about how to keep your man interested? One way you can do that is by being spontaneous. Spontaneity does not demand you to do something new, exciting, and adventurous every day of every week. But, you can surprise your man once or twice a month. This can be something as simple as booking a table at his favorite restaurant or something adventurous like scuba diving sessions, karate classes, hand boxing lessons, etc., to treat his adrenaline junkie spirit.

8. Take Over In The Bedroom

A sexual relationship is one of the important aspects to set the chemistry with your partner at the right pace. Try something new in the bedroom regularly to keep the spark alive in the relationship and keep him hooked. Everybody has unique preferences in terms of what they like in the bedroom, and while you should always communicate the same with your partner, it is also important to remember that men also enjoy it when the woman takes charge. Take control, lead things, and make him swoon over you and your confidence. If you are hesitant to do this or feeling shy, there are lots of resources available on the web. They will help you ease into the process, show you how to enjoy it, build physical and emotional attraction, and help you have a better sex life.

9. Never Stop Flirting

Usually, once the honeymoon phase of a relationship ends, a routine sets in. Avoid this and try to keep the romance alive, passionate, and exciting. Keep up the conversation momentum and continue flirting with your guy to make him feel wanted. Try to come up with fun questions to ask, interesting pick-up lines, and conversation-starter questions. Or, you can simply look for them on the web if you are running out of ideas. Go back to the honeymoon phase of your relationship and do the things he liked back then.

10. Take Into Consideration His Zodiac Sign

Woman reading man's zodiac traits o keep him interested
Image: Shutterstock

Zodiac signs reveal a lot about the person. If you are having trouble reading your man and figuring out his likes and dislikes, find out what his zodiac says. There are several star signs quizzes available online – sign him up for those to understand his emotional, sexual, physical, and intellectual sensibilities. This will also help you understand if he likes public display of affection or believes in old-school romance. There are several books also that you can read to deeply understand your man’s zodiac sign and act accordingly.

11. Share Your Vulnerabilities With Him

If you need emotional or any other kind of support, do not shy away from asking for help. This conversation will not only help you deal with your problem better but also make your man feel important. He will enjoy the fact that he was the first person you thought of in your hour of need. In the future, he may also do the same.Through this, you will make a special place for yourself in his life. If not emotional support, you can ask for help for something as simple as a grocery run, advice while buying a new phone, etc.

12. Do Not Be Afraid To Commit

Man proposing to woman to show commitment in the relationship
Image: Shutterstock

Commitment is one of the many keys to a successful and healthy relationship. If the man you are interested in is getting around to the idea of being exclusive with you, and you have also begun to feel certain about him, do the same in return. Through a strong commitment bond, you and your partner can build a great life together, lean on each other when needed, and create beautiful moments you will be able to cherish for a lifetime. Knowing you are there for him while going through a very difficult time, he will never think of leaving you.

13. Do Not Play Hard To Get

It is fine to keep your man a little curious about you to keep him interested and excited to know more, but do not go overboard with it. Playing mind games and making it extremely hard for him to get you not only adversely affects your relationship but also makes him lose interest in you. The whole point of being in a committed relationship is to derive happiness from it. If being with you demands constant effort and strategizing, he will eventually want to leave you. Remember, having peace of mind is key to a successful relationship.

14. Busy Or Not, Keep Having Sex

Many couples make the mistake of forgetting sex as they get increasingly involved in the responsibilities of adulting, like professional challenges and family commitments. However, no matter how hard it gets, never take romantic attraction and sex for granted. Constantly look for ways to improve your sex life even if you have passed the dating stage. Sex allows you to build not only physical intimacy but also emotional intimacy with your partner. You can even have discussions on intimacy; this will help you know each other at the physical level and emotional level. You also can understand their frame of mind. Make sure that you and your partner have a decent amount of sex to keep things interesting in your relationship.

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You may surprise him by wearing his favorite role-play costumes or unexpected lingeries to enhance the mood in the bedroom and increase physical intimacy in your relationship.

15. Do Not Be Afraid Of Conflicts

Couple resolving conflicts
Image: Shutterstock

Not every conflict is bad, and conflicts help a great deal in improving the quality of communication you share with your partner. Make sure to bring your concerns before your partner from time to time. Don’t keep them to yourself, as it will only complicate things. Whether your form of communication is assertive or passive, it’s important to focus on resolving conflicts in a healthy way. Unlike what’s shown in movies, relationships in real life are far from perfect. Problems and disagreements are perpetual. So, it’s important to always speak your mind and give your partner space to speak his. Your partner will greatly appreciate the fact that he can share everything with you without being scared of you judging him. This will not only keep him interested in you but also love and respect you immensely.

16. Do Not Drag Your Fights

Despite putting in numerous efforts to have a calm conversation about things that bother you both, sometimes things can get out of hand, and you may end up arguing with your guy. This might leave you feeling emotionally drained and low on energy. Remember, having occasional fights does not mean you are incompatible as a couple. However, always keep the golden rule in mind, which is, to never go to bed angry with each other. Learn to put aside your ego and apologize if you think you were wrong. Seeing you, he will also learn and do the same when required. However, also keep in mind that feminine energy is different from masculine energy. The former is more flowing and the latter is stable. Thus, it’s important to strike the right balance between them for a healthy long-term relationship.

17. Keep It Interesting Over Text

If you are struggling with figuring out how to keep your long-distance boyfriend interested, then this tip can be useful for you. Text messages are a great platform to be both loving and naughty. It helps you enjoy your dating stage. Drop some love messages now and then. Spice it up with some naughty messages that will make him look forward to meeting you. Sending frequent text messages can help increase relationship satisfaction and strengthen it. You can also text him about some roleplay ideas you want to try with him.

18. Do Not Make His Friends Your Friends

It is great that you and your partner are sharing a life, but that does not mean you have to share every aspect of it. One such misconception is that being friends with your partner’s friend can really help improve your equation with your boyfriend. However, this need not to be true. You must give him the liberty to meet his friends by himself, meet new people, and go on adventures without you. Having a friend who knows your partner well or just the same group of friends will not allow him to take a break from you, which might get overwhelming. The key to keeping him interested is to let him breathe and have personal space of his own. This will ensure you maintain a healthy relationship.

19. Ask Him Important And Thoughtful Questions

A relationship is not always about having fun and keeping it light. What makes a relationship great is being able to talk about everything. Spend quality time with your partner. Do not shy away from asking him thoughtful and deep questions about his individual life and past experiences. This will help strengthen your interpersonal relationship. The questions can be about work, school, parents, friends, hobbies, favorite band, current events, tennis matches, etc. It will show him that you genuinely care about him. This will help you have a happy and long lasting relationship. However, do not be repetitive with your questions. Listen to him properly when he answers the questions. Do not just ask the questions for the sake of seeming interested.

20. Cook For Him

Woman cooking for him to keep him interested
Image: IStock

Who does not love a delicious meal? Cooking for someone is probably one of the most beautiful ways to express that you love them, and there is no harm in trying it out yourself. Try your hand at cooking or baking some of his favorite food or certain never-tried-before dishes. Do not worry about getting the dish absolutely right. What counts the most is your effort and willingness to try out different things for him instead of merely preparing delicious food. Lastly, if you think you cannot handle cooking yourself, get your favorite food delivered at home and have a nice date night.

21. Communicate Openly

Communicate freely and do not keep things bottled up inside you. This is especially important at the beginning of a budding relationship. Indulge in intelligent conversations and ask deep questions. This will help you feel closer to your partner than ever. If you are uncomfortable talking about certain things, you can text him. If you are thinking about what to text him to keep him interested, the answer is pretty simple – speak your mind. This will ensure smooth and effective communication and keep you both interested in each other. If you think your texts sound very serious, you can tone them down by using his favorite emojis. Always remember that effective communication skills can help save your relationship when misunderstandings and disagreements arise.

22. Make An Effort To Smell Good

There’s nothing like the feeling of your significant other putting on a sexy perfume. Just the type of women men cannot resist. Try to figure out his favorite scent, or experiment with some basic yet attractive scents like vanilla, citrus, rose, orchid, lavender, sandalwood, peppermint, etc. For date nights at home, you can try using scented candles to create a romantic atmosphere.

23. Dress Up For Him

One way to make your guy feel important and keep him interested in you is to dress nicely for him. Everyone appreciates it when their partner makes an extra effort for them. It is one of the few ways to show your partner that you want to please them and care about their needs while also loving yourself enough to make an effort to look great!

24. Commit To Dealing With Past Trauma

While it is not easy to come to terms with past trauma, choosing to deal with your mental health is a great step in improving the health of your committed relationship as well. This is something that will help you reach out to your partner and communicate your needs better. It also will give them a deep sense of understanding of who you are as a person and how past experiences have shaped your life. Your mental health journey will be long and painful but make sure to take it at your pace.

Infographic: 8 Simple Tips To Capture His Interest

There are many effortless ways to attract a guy, but keeping him interested in you is a different ball game altogether. However, it is not difficult once you understand that he may feel the same way about you but approaches things and processes them differently. We have narrowed down eight tips that will keep you on his mind every moment that he is away from you. Check them out in the infographic below.

8 simple tips to capture his interest (infographic)

Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team

While these tips on how to keep a guy interested will help you keep him hooked initially, you must also know that long-term serious relationships are seldom built without love and respect. Only apply these when you have genuine feelings for someone. It is disrespectful to use someone’s feelings to prove a point. However, if you do like the person, do not be too harsh on yourself while pursuing them, and remember to love yourself. Be true to your feelings and let the guy know your intentions without overwhelming them. Things will slowly but surely fall into place.

Frequently Asked Questions

What attracts a man to a woman?

Some of the traits men find attractive in women include self-confidence, a sense of humor, independence, and sexual compatibility.

Does ignoring a boy get his attention?

Possibly. In fact, if you are wondering about how to impress a boy who is not interested in you, this could be one effective formula. Ignoring a boy can keep him on his toes and keep him guessing, but it can also backfire and make him think you are not interested, and the connection may fizzle.

What to do when a man is no longer interested in me?

To discover that he is no longer interested in you can be a painful thing to discover. Respect his decisions and part ways amicably. Seek emotional support from your family, close friends, or that one female friend or guy friend that you can always rely on. Focus on personal growth and self-care. Remember to not take this rejection as a reflection of your worth or value as a person.

Key Takeaways

  • In a relationship, small gestures go a long way in keeping the partners connected with each other even after the honeymoon phase is over.
  • Accepting, acknowledging, and appreciating your man for the person he is, helps build a strong bond of love, care, and respect.
  • Working on improving your own skill set while giving them their own personal space, would keep them eager and confident to reach back to you.

Learn the secret to keeping a man interested in you! Watch this video to discover the tips and tricks to make him stay in love with you forever.

Personal Experience: Source

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Rodolfo Parlati

Rodolfo ParlatiProfessional Life Coach

After having graduated in Business Administration, Rodolfo decided to follow his passion for supporting others by becoming a professional coach. Today, his mission is to help people be happy and successful by discovering their potential and finding together the right way to fully exploit it.   His clients experience improvements in their communication skills, relationships, work-life balance, productivity, conflict resolution,...read full bio

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