How To Romance Your Wife

Written by Harini Natarajan , Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner

Keeping the spark burning is the key to a long and happy marriage. Are you looking for various ways to romance your wife? It doesn’t take a great grand gesture to show your wife that your heart still skips a few beats every time you look at her. More often, it is the little things you do that count – washing the dishes when she’s tired, holding her hand when you go for a stroll, dancing in your living room, and taking her out for a candlelight dinner.

Here are some ways you keep the heat alive in your marriage and show your wife she still sweeps you off your feet. Keep reading!

1. Spend Time With Your Wife

At times, romancing your wife is as simple as spending time with her. Between juggling your careers, children, and other responsibilities, you may forget to make time for each other. You become so comfortable in your life that it may not occur to you that your wife needs those few moments of sanity with you. She may also get a feeling that you do not value her or have started taking her for granted.

Although you may mean well, it does not send a good message when your wife sees you busy with work calls or night outs with your buddies. You may want to pause, reflect on your schedule, and try to make time for her. Even if your routine allows you to give her only 15 minutes, make a start.

During this time, tell her that you are exclusively available for her. Tell her about your day and ask her how hers went. She will feel valued and loved to see that she is still a priority for you.

2. Take Her Out On Dates

Remember the time you two were dating? Would you not look forward to your meetings and steal every little excuse to meet her? As you get married and start living together, you may begin taking her presence for granted. When you have kids, you may become so involved in their lives that the thought of going on dates may not cross your mind. However, it may take a toll on your relationship.

Planning dates every now and then is one of the most romantic things you can do for your wife. Choose a day in the week where you make time exclusively for her and take her out. For instance, you can have Thursday night dates. Let her know about this and make sure that you do not stand her up.

Make arrangements for babysitters if you have toddlers to look after. Your wife will feel pampered and will be able to focus more on you when her mind is stress-free.

3. Make Her Feel Special

You may feel that after spending so many years together, your wife knows that you love her. You may not feel the need to express your love. However, your wife may feel ignored and unloved as a result.

Try to think of the last time you did something special for her. If it was on her birthday a couple of months ago, you are already late. You do not have to spend lavishly to express how much you love her. The easiest thing you can do to romance your wife and make her smile is to send her a text saying how much you love her and miss her. You can get her flowers or leave little notes around the house. Cook dinner for her or give her a foot massage while watching TV.

4. Be Kind

Be patient, helpful, and gentle with your wife. Although these qualities are often ignored, they can help you convey how much you still love your wife. Help your wife with her chores. You may get a break on the weekends, but she may never get one. You can even divide the tasks and take more responsibility in running the household.

If you are having an argument, watch your words. Instead of yelling and shouting, sit down and have a calm discussion with your wife. Support her when she is having a tough time at work. Have her back to give her a safe zone. Let her know that you are always there no matter what.

5. Tell Her She is Beautiful

Women love to dress up, and when their husbands tell them they look beautiful, they feel their efforts are worth it. Never ever compare your wife to other women or ask her to tone her body like an actress. Love her for her heart and help her build body positivity.

Tell her she looks pretty even when her hair is tied up in a messy bun or she is sweating after mowing the lawn. Help her feel beautiful from the inside, and you will notice an instant change in your romantic life.

6. Be The Guy You Once Were

You would have been at your charming best when you were chasing your wife. Perhaps you were more humorous, loving, or courteous back then. She fell in love with that version of you and would always want to have you that way. As you start living under one roof, you may not see the need to charm your wife as much.

To win her affection once again and romance your wife, bring that guy back. Try to recreate your dates and work your charm once again. She will feel wanted and will get the message that love is not dead between you two.

7. Set The Mood

Physical intimacy is always a big part of your romantic life. Try to initiate more moments in the bedroom, and you can also spice things up. There is no better way to express that you still love her and want her in your life than to make her happy in the bedroom.

When you are at it, trying to set the mood could be the most romantic thing to do for your wife. Play sensual music, light candles, and above all, ensure that you get some alone time. You can also gift your wife some lingerie to spice things up.

8. Show Your Affection In Public

Women like it when their husbands are romantic in public. You do not have to indulge in excessive PDA or do something you do not like. However, you can always hold her hands or look into her eyes lovingly. Pull her close or put your arm around her as you get a picture clicked. She may blush, but she will enjoy the attention and love that you shower on her.

9. Plan A Trip

If you feel the romance in your married life has taken a backseat, try to plan a trip together. Nothing can work as well as a vacation in bringing both of you closer. You can take a weekend trip if a long holiday is not practical. Even a staycation will work when you are trying to romance your wife.

The idea is to spend time together and bring back the romance that seems to have been lost along the way. As you go, try to leave your work behind. It will give your wife a good break from her responsibilities and work pressures. Try to select a place in the lap of nature where you can be together in the truest sense.

10. Share Light Times

Romance is also about looking at the lighter side of life. A couple that laughs together has a strong bond. Meet up with friends whose company you both enjoy. You can also go to a standup comedy show or watch a light-hearted movie. Do something that will make her laugh, and you will see a change in your bond.

11. Play With Her And Tease Her

Friendship is an inherent part of romance. When you are friends, your bond is stronger. Moreover, there is no formality or boundaries when you are friends. Try to make the environment of your house light and indulge in some harmless teasing when you are trying to romance your wife.

You can play your little games of hide-and-seek, give each other nicknames, or do anything that is exclusive to your relationship. You can also give naughty nicknames and save them for your private moments.

12. Encourage Her To Pursue Her Dreams

Does your wife have any unfulfilled goals or desires? Encourage her and give her your full support to pursue them. For instance, ask her to take up painting if that is what she wanted to do. Ask her to graduate in the course of her choice if she could not finish her studies. When you do this, you will convey your true love to your wife. Be the wind under her wings and give her the sky to fly.

13. Get Rid Of Habits She Does Not Like

If there is something that she has been telling you to change or get rid of, you may want to give it a thought. Whether it is your habit of drinking or smoking, nothing is more important than her place in your life.

At times, men may indulge in distractions such as spending too much time on play stations, spending too much time with their buddies, or eating out excessively. In such situations, you’re the best judge, especially if you know what irks your wife.

Instead of shunning it away, you may want to work on it now. If your wife is asking you to get rid of a habit, it is for your own good. Doing so will bring harmony to your married life.

14. Respect Her

A marriage is a relationship that has its foundation in trust and respect. Respecting your wife does not mean that you are considerate of her only in a social setting. It means giving her the place she deserves even when you are alone. Respect her time as much as you value yours.

For instance, if you tell her that you will be home early and take her on a drive, make it possible. She could have canceled her plans or arranged for a babysitter to be with you.

15. Be Courteous

Being married does not mean that you stop being courteous to your wife. In fact, if there is anyone who deserves it the most, it is her. Open doors or pull chairs for her, and give your full attention when talking to her. Look into her eyes when you are talking to her so that she knows that you are not distracted. Sometimes, romancing your wife is as simple as that.

16. Buy Her Gifts

Get her gifts on regular days too, and not just on anniversaries and birthdays. You do not have to break your bank and get her something expensive every time you want to get her a gift. Even flowers will do the trick. The point is to get something when your wife is not expecting it. You can talk to her friends to get an idea if she has been eyeing something recently. Take time to wrap her gifts beautifully, and she will appreciate the effort.

17. Do What Makes Her Feel Loved

Every individual is different and may have different needs when it comes to being loved. For some women, it means a lot when their husband lends a helping hand in the kitchen. Some others may want to be complimented.

Find out what works with your wife and relieve her stress. It may take time for you to reach a stage where you know what works – but be with her on this journey. For now, you can ask her how it is that you can help her. Over time, you may want to focus your attention on what makes her loved. Find out what she responds to and what makes her happy.

18. Step Up

You cannot expect your wife to respond to your romantic gestures unless you step up in your other responsibilities. If you have kids, step up in your role as a father. Help them with their homework, drop them off at school, or manage their tantrums.

When you help her in sharing responsibilities, she is more likely to welcome your ways when you try to romance her.

19. Avoid Criticizing Her

It is unlikely that your wife will appreciate your romantic gestures if you are always criticizing or demeaning her. If there is something you feel that she can work upon, tell her about it at the right time and in a sensitive and constructive manner. Never tell her in public or when you are in company.

Moreover, be gentle with your words and do not say something that you would not like to hear.

20. Tell Her You Love Her

Sometimes, romancing your wife is as simple as this. Look into your wife’s eyes and tell her that you love her. Do it when she is expecting it the least, and she will instantly throw her warmest smile at you. When you have been married for a few years, you may not say it often, but these three magic words never lose their charm.


Marriage is a beautiful relationship, and it is necessary to keep the spark alive. If you feel the romance has been lost along the way, you need not worry. With the tips given above, you can not only romance your wife but also bring fresh energy into your lives. Start trying these today and see your marriage reignite!

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