5 Key Pieces Of Advice To Stop A Divorce And Save Your Marriage

Understanding the nuances is crucial to making the right decision at the right time.

Reviewed by Casey M. Reiter, Esq, Appellate & Litigation Support Attorney
By Harini Natarajan, Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner

Divorce is a drastic step to end your relationship. If you want to know how to stop a divorce before things are said and done so you can have a second chance at the relationship, you are at the right place.

You are probably witnessing your whole world fall apart. The hurt worsens when you have no idea why your partner is trying to break up with you. It would seem impossible that you missed the signs that your partner had slipped away from you. You want to figure out what went wrong and stop it before it gets worse.

Are you questioning how to stop your divorce or facing a similar situation? We are here to help. Here is what you need to know.

How To Stop A Divorce: Advice And Tips

Advice and tips on how to stop a divorce

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1. Acknowledge There Was A Problem

Acknowledgment is the first step to healing. Acknowledge your partner’s feelings and that maybe something was not working out in the marriage is crucial. It shows your sincere effort and that you are ready to work on repairing the relationship. Turning a blind eye to your partner’s desires and wishes makes them feel unvalued and may tear your relationship apart.

Talk to your partner. Hear them out without interruption and understand their point of view. Get into your partner’s shoes and empathize. This will help you get to the root of the problem.

2. Apologize, If Necessary

An apology can repair everything if it comes from your heart. It is the first step towards healing. While we understand that mistakes may happen from both sides, if you realize that you did wrong, accept it, and apologize. Talk to your partner and figure out together how you can do things differently. People make mistakes, but it is important to learn from the mistakes and give the relationship your best shot.

3. Get Help And Go The Extra Mile

Be open to marriage counseling. Marriage counselors can help create an environment where both of you can sit down and discuss your issues. Sessions with the therapist can help you identify the problems, understand each other’s points of view, and provide solutions to mend your relationship.

Make it a point to put effort into your relationship with your spouse. Try spending more alone time with them. Go out on dates. Before planning anything, ask their opinion and ensure that both of you are on the same page. Listen to what they have to say and respond accordingly. Take an interest in the things they love. Appreciate them for everything they are doing and celebrate their accomplishments.

4. Avoid The Blame Game

Maybe one or both of you went wrong – do not bring the past into your conversations. This will fuel the fire and increase the distance between both of you. Avoid falling into the victim mode and blame your partner unfairly. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of the relationship.

If you want to save your marriage, show your partner that you can do anything for them. Bring some positivity into your relationship and let your actions speak for you.

5. Have Faith In Yourself

Have faith in yourself as much as you do in your relationship. If you truly love your partner and want to make the relationship work, do not give up. Staying mentally strong and having faith in yourself will help you keep going. Make constant efforts.

Even if your spouse agrees to come back – do not stop with your efforts. You have to keep working to keep your marriage strong. A relationship needs constant nurturing, just like a little sapling. Otherwise, it may wither.

While you make constant efforts to win your spouse back, is there anything you can do to stop a divorce legally? Scroll down to find out.

What Can You Do Legally To Stop A Divorce?

If your spouse has filed for divorce, getting them to order a retraction (meaning: to dismiss the pleadings filed in court) is the only way to stop the proceedings.

However, if your partner is determined to get a divorce no matter what you are willing to do, it is better to let them go. Love and relationships cannot be forced. This will make your partner feel constrained and increase their bitterness towards you.

Despite your efforts, if your partner wants to go ahead with the divorce, it is better to do it amicably. It can be tough for you. Here are a few tips to help you cope with the situation.

5 Tips To Help You Cope

Tips to help you cope a divorce

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1. Do Not Put Your Kids In The Middle

Kids have a difficult time coping with the divorce stress. Do not try to use your children to make your partner stay back in the marriage. This will turn things bitter between you two. Moreover, kids can sense when their parents are not happy being together. Instead, prioritize their happiness and find a middle ground where both parents are equally responsible for taking care of them.

2. Avoid Involving Your Friends And Family

While you can turn to your friends and family as a support system, avoid getting them between both of you. They may perceive matters differently, which may or may not be right. This may further complicate things between you and your spouse.

3. Nurture Your Emotions

It is natural to feel overwhelmed by emotions while dealing with divorce. However, avoid neglecting your feelings. Accept the truth and take care of your emotional well-being. Practice self-care. This will help promote feelings of self-worth.

4. Allow Yourself To Grieve

“One of the hardest things you will ever have to do, my dear, is to grieve the loss of a person who is still alive” – Anonymous

Divorce can be emotionally taxing, and you may feel a wide range of emotions. Do not suppress your emotions and allow yourself to feel them. Grief is unavoidable, and acknowledging your emotions is the only way to heal. However, avoid self-destructive habits.

5. Pay Attention To Your Health

Even though you feel a range of emotions within, it is crucial to pay attention to your health. Stay active and exercise. This may help stabilize and relieve the pain, anger, and anxiety within you. Consume healthy food and get plenty of rest. Direct all your love towards yourself. This will help you heal.

Unhealthy relationships can negatively impact your life. It is important to set your own needs first and be ready to disregard a relationship that does not respect you. There will be many hardships on the way before you successfully breakthrough, like the many memories, happy moments shared with your partner, or your unmet expectations and hope that make you want to stay and see if things change for the better. Find your inner strength by remembering the adverse effects these unhealthy bonds will have in the long term. Learn to recognize the signs that he is using you to avoid emotional upheaval in your future relationships.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can you change your mind about a divorce?

Yes, you can change your mind about your divorce. If both you and your spouse want to remain married and agree to work on it, you can withdraw your divorce petition from the court.

What happens if one spouse doesn’t want a divorce?

If one spouse wants a divorce and the other doesn’t, it is best for the couple to have a conversation about it. Talk calmly about why you want to get a divorce and give your spouse some time to think about it before you file for divorce.

Key Takeaways

  • Seek professional help if you want to stop a divorce. A retraction order can stop the divorce proceedings legally.
  • Acknowledge the issues, do not blame each other, and have faith in yourself.
  • Be ready to walk the extra mile and visit a marriage counselor to mend your relationship.

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Casey M. Reiter

(Esq)
Casey M. Reiter is an appellate and litigation support attorney practicing in Florida. Her focus areas are Family and Marital... more

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