10 Times When Love Is Not Enough To Save A Relationship

Regular clashes or distrust may indicate that this boat needs more than love to stay afloat.

By Harini NatarajanHarini Natarajan, Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner  • 

You dwell in a euphoric state when you are in love, and everything seems better. But for a healthy relationship, only love is not enough. Because relationships work on many things like compatibility, cooperation, and trust. Also, even if you have these qualities, your relationship can get difficult because of your goals or different priorities in life.

Long-term relationships need more than love to sustain. This article explores what else your relationship needs more than love. Scroll down for more information.

When Love Is Not Enough To Save A Relationship

Love is usually defined as the constant affection for someone. But certain things can alter this constant affection and change the meaning of love. Given below are certain major scenarios where love alone is not enough to save the relationship.

1. When There Is A Lack Of Compatibility

Love is not enough when you often fight due to lack of compatibility

Image: IStock

Those in a compatible relationship with their partner will work together at every level. Compatibility is sharing the same interests and goals and handling each other’s differences, resolving conflicts, and planning the future while staying on the same page.

But certain relationships are not compatible. While one is willing to put all the effort into the relationship, the other may not. At times, you may love your partner, but you may not be able to accept their differences. These are signs of a lack of compatibility in the relationship.

2. When Things Beyond Your Control Happen

Life can get hard sometimes. Stressful episodes in your life, like discovering a severe illness, the death of a loved one, or something else beyond our control can happen. Such instances can change you forever. In such cases, a relationship can crumble if it has been standing on the foundation of love alone.

3. When You Are Mature But Your Partner Is Not (Or Vice Versa)

Many people have immature partners who refuse to grow up. The relationship grows apart in such cases. This is because most people’s thought processes, needs, and interests change over time. A relationship can suffer if all it has is mere love.

4. When There Are Ego Issues

Ego issues are common in every relationship. Ego clashes arise when you, your significant other, or both are unwilling to make up or resolve the conflicts in your relationship.

Such problems generally occur due to fear of loss of control over the other person or any other insecurity. Imagine a scenario when you are not willing to apologize to your partner even when you know you were wrong. Such ego issues can take a toll on the relationship.

5. When Toxicity Has Developed In Your Relationship

Love is not enough if there is a constant ego clash

Image: Shutterstock

While you were having a blissful streak of good days in your relationship earlier, your partner suddenly becomes abusive. People in toxic relationships usually do not give up. They hope that their partner will change one day, or they believe their happiness solely depends on their relationship. However, toxic relationships worsen with time. Lack of mutual respect is often a cause for a relationship to go toxic.

6. When Trust Is Broken

Your partner lied to you or cheated on you. But you forgave them and your relationship appears normal now. Although cheating may not mean the end of a relationship, rarely can trust be re-established. There are also chances that your partner may break your trust again. When you lose trust in someone, it is hard to confide in them again.

7. When Differences Exist Between You And Your In-laws

In-laws' interference may affect the relationship between a couple

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A relationship like marriage always happens between two families. But such a relationship may not work if the parents do not approve of it. Societal issues, a partner’s socioeconomic status, career, and lifestyle choices are some reasons the older members of a family may not approve of a relationship.

8. When There Is No Communication

Communication is the key to a healthy relationship. If you do not communicate with your partner effectively, they would not understand your needs, thoughts, and other things that matter to you. The same goes for them too. Lack of proper communication can shake the foundation of a relationship, even if there is love between the partners.

9. When You Are In A Long-Distance Relationship

Long-distance relationships are hard, and they get harder when the distance between the couple prolongs. Most long-distance relationships do not tend to last forever. Dating someone who is geographically separated from you and has a lower probability of relocating can take a serious toll on your relationship.

10. When Your Physical Needs Are Vastly Different

Disparity in physical needs can create a rift between a couple

Image: Shutterstock

Everyone has different wants and desires when it comes to a physical relationship. You may want more frequent sex than your partner or vice-versa. You may be willing to compromise as long as you know you are with the right person. However, this is not always the case with everyone.

Quick Tip
Keeping a personal gratitude journal helps you focus on the positive side of life. Also, acknowledging and appreciating your partner is important for a strong relationship.

Some couples have different needs surrounding physical intimacy and sex. Lack of sexual satisfaction may cause problems in a relationship even when there is love.

Signs Something Is Missing In Your Relationship

Is love all you need to sustain a happy and healthy relationship? In reality, you can love your partner deeply and still feel your relationship is missing something. Certain elements complete a relationship, and the relationship may not seem enough even if one of those elements is missing. Following are certain signs that tell you that something is amiss in your relationship. These can help you make the necessary adjustments to make your relationship work.

1. You Are Not Your Partner’s Priority

Although you may want your partner to spend time with their loved ones, you would not want them to prioritize their other relationships over yours. Is your significant other making you feel less important? That’s a sign that needs to be addressed immediately.

2. Timings Are Off

You may want to settle down with the love of your life, but they still may need more time. However, that does not mean you need to separate from them. Give them time and see what else they can offer you in the present. If nothing seems to progress, it could be a sign that something is amiss in your relationship.

3. You Are The Only One Putting In Any Effort

One-sided love is not sufficient for a healthy mutual relationship

Image: IStock

No relationship can last a lifetime if the effort does not come from both the people involved. A committed person will make effort to be in the relationship no matter how hard it gets. It’s time to rethink if you are the only one initiating conversations, taking care of your partner, and doing things that require mutual effort.

 4. Your Partner Does Not Show Accountability

A partner who is not accountable for their actions will only keep blaming you for all the conflicts in the relationship. This is not a sign of a healthy relationship. It may even result in sacrifices from one end. Is your partner always playing the blame-game? Do not ignore that sign.

Quick Tip
Listen to your partner patiently. If you listen to them to respond rather than to understand, this will drain the feeling of love from your relationship.

Are you sure you are in the right relationship? Asking yourself a few important questions can help you understand.

Questions To Ask Yourself

  • How do I feel about myself when I am with my partner?
  • Is my life better with or without them?
  • Do they know the real me, or are they willing to know?
  • Are my core values aligned with their values?
  • Is my partner making me a better person?

Key Takeaways

  • Cooperation, compatibility, and trust – and not just love – are important to make a relationship last.
  • Ego issues and a lack of compatibility and communication are essential to sustain a relationship.
  • If you are not a priority in a relationship or you are the only one putting effort into the relationship, these are signs that something crucial is missing in your relationship.

Infographic – How To Bring Back The Relationship Charm

Relationships may hit a rough patch sometimes. But you must not allow this unfavorable situation to make you feel miserable. You have spent some beautiful memories with your partner, so can you ever let this bond lose its strength just like that? Certainly not. Some efforts put in by the two of you can go a long way. And even if separation seems to be the ideal choice at the end of the day, you will at least be content about trying your best. So, check out the infographic below to know how to save your relationship.

how to bring back the relationship charm (infographic)

Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team

Save the high-quality PDF version on your device now.

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Download Infographic in PDF version

Love is obviously the soul of a relationship, but love alone is not enough to keep a relationship healthy. Compatibility, communication, trust, physical compatibility, and maturity play a major role in a healthy relationship. Many a time, ego clashes and differences with the in-laws can lead to separation despite the couple sharing immense love and affection for each other. It becomes all the more difficult for those in long-distance relationships to sustain their bond due to the absence of the factors listed above. This is, unfortunately, one of those situations when love is not enough.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can you love one person your whole life?

Yes, you can love one person your whole life. But understand that a romantic bond requires patience, effort, and contribution by both members, as do all relationships. You and your partner have to put in the work to keep the spark alive and the love burning for each other.

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