10 Signs Of A Rebound Relationship And How To Introspect

What Is A Rebound Relationship?

A rebound relationship is a relationship where someone is dating a new person without being entirely over their ex. Most often, people rush into a relationship as a way of rebounding after a loss or rebounding after a death without thinking it through. Such relationships often end as quickly as they started as they are not built on a solid connection and mutual attraction.

There could be many reasons people get into a rebound relationship. They may be lonely after a breakup and seek solace in someone. Another popular reason is to forget the ex by moving on to a new relationship. Sometimes the rebounder is attempting to get back at the ex, which is really not an authentic basis for a relationship. Often, such relationships are dangerous for both the partners involved as they can be emotionally draining and inauthentic.

The stages of a rebound relationship may vary from person to person, but most of them have some common patterns. Learn about them in the next section.

Stages Of A Rebound Relationship

Once you break up with your partner and get into a rebound relationship, you may experience these stages:

• Immediate Attraction: You may experience strong attraction towards your rebound partner. This may be fueled by the desire to fill the emotional void left by the previous relationship.
• Rapid Progression: Your relationship may progress quickly and you may feel a deep connection with the person.
• Noticing Red Flags: Once the initial euphoria fades, you may begin to think about your unresolved emotional baggage and even start comparing your partner with your ex.

Wondering if rebound relationships have a fighting chance? Find out below.

Do Rebound Relationships Ever Work?

Most often, rebound relationships don’t work, especially if the persons involved are rebounding after a betrayal, rebounding after a divorce, or rebounding after infidelity. But if both partners work on healing from the pain and trauma of their previous relationships, there is a chance for the present relationship to work out. It is important to deal with the raw and unprocessed emotions you are going through after the breakup and maintain transparency about these emotions with your partner.

Of course, it is not easy to get over a person you have deeply loved, but it is not fair to carry that baggage into the next relationship. The duration of the previous relationship and how attached you were to the person play an important role in your healing process.

Ideally, you should work on yourself and give yourself time to heal. It is important to understand and introspect why the previous relationship did not work out and the part you played in it before you move on to your next relationship. This ensures that you have more success in the next relationship.

How do you know if you are in a rebound relationship? Are there any warning signs that can help you figure it out? Keep reading to find out.

The Signs of A Rebound Relationship To Watch Out For

1. You Think About Your Ex Constantly

It is normal to think about your ex and the previous relationship. But if these thoughts constantly hound your mind, it’s time that you break the pattern. It is unhealthy to spend so much time thinking about your ex. It blocks you from moving forward in your life, not just your relationship. Our mind plays tricks on us, and we often idolize and idealize our ex and the previous relationship. Sometimes, these thoughts become compulsive and obsessive, often leading to psychological problems. It is important to train yourself to consciously curb these thought patterns.

Constantly thinking about your ex will prevent you from paying attention to your current partner, and it is not fair to either of you.

2. You Struggle With Deleting Photos Of Your Previous Partner

Memories need to be cherished. But when it comes to wanting a clean break, there is no option but to delete all the photos from your previous relationship. You will not be able to move on if you keep browsing through them from time to time. You must refrain from checking the pictures of your ex so you can heal in a healthy way.

If you don’t want to delete them completely, it is a good idea to store them on a hard disk that is not easily accessible. You can revisit them after a few months to see how you still feel about them. Deleting these photos now may not seem as heartbreaking.

3. You Still Have Your Ex’s Phone Number Saved In Your Phone

It is daunting to completely cut ties with your partner after a breakup, but it is important that you delete their number. You can start by blocking their number, then deleting it. However, it is important not to stay connected with your ex until you are over them. Constant communication can revive your feelings but may not revive your relationship, especially if your ex is not in the same emotional mind space as you. The best way is to cut the cord in a clean, swift motion. It also keeps your relationship from getting messy and ugly.

4. You Check Up On Your Ex Often

Just because you broke up does not mean that your ex stopped existing! Of course, you wonder about them and what they are doing. But if you keep checking on them often, asking if they are doing okay, it is a problem. Keep in mind that your partner is an adult and respect the decision to break up. It is great if you can stay friends, but it is completely inappropriate to keep hounding them with calls and texts. Few can shift gears from intimate partners to friends immediately. This can happen if the relationship has been gradually devolving, but most people need a clean break and distance to process, then see if they can be friends without another agenda.

If it gets excessive, it can count as mental harassment and stalking.

It is natural that you are worried about them, and sometimes anxiety drives you to check up on them, but it is unhealthy in the long run. A good idea to check up on your ex’s well-being is to ask your mutual friends about them every once in a while.

5. You Stalk Your Ex’s Social Media Profile

In the current digital age, it has become increasingly easier to look up your ex and see what they are doing. This easy access can be detrimental to you, especially if you broke up recently. The more you learn about your ex, the more you will be invested in their life. All this only steals away from your life and current relationship. Every new picture you see will trigger irrational thoughts or assumptions about how your ex has moved on or how they are doing in their life. Often, this comparison breeds misery. This will trickle into your current relationship. You might even post inauthentic pictures with your current partner to prove that you are happy too.

6. Your Current Relationship Feel Rushed

If you feel your current relationship is moving very quickly, it is a red flag. A healthy relationship takes time to build as you need to invest time and effort to learn about each other and develop an emotional attachment. If you notice that you are covering all the relationship milestones without building intimacy, or are unduly comparing your new partner to your ex, it is time you pause a little. It will save you both some heartache in the end.

Jessica, a blogger, discussing her insights about rebound relationships, advises, “Be careful not to quickly jump into the arms of the man that looks like a knight in shining armor. I shared really personal things with this guy really early into the relationship. It made me feel like we were closer than we actually were. It also made it really hard to clearly see the ugly truth that this man would never commit to me (i).”

7. Plans With Your Current Partner Often Fall Through

Do you end up canceling your plans with your partner often? Do you feel like it takes too much effort to go on a date or to work on the present relationship? These are signs that indicate that you are not invested in the relationship and/or are having difficulty being single as well. You should respect your current partner and yourself and follow through with your commitments. If you feel you are not interested in spending quality time with your partner, then it is better you take a break from the relationship. Not only are you lying to yourself but misleading someone else.

8. You Still Want To Get Back With Your Ex

If you catch yourself dreaming up scenarios where you get back with your ex, it is not a good sign. Since you are already in another relationship, it amounts to emotional cheating. You must not entertain such thoughts as they are detrimental to your current relationship.

You must carefully introspect about the breakup and be realistic about it. Romanticizing your past will only lead to more heartache and complications.

9. You Lack Emotional Intimacy With Your Current Partner

It is not easy to date someone after a breakup. But if you have solid chemistry and a good emotional connection, you can make the relationship work. On the other hand, most rebounding relationships are superficial in nature. There is no real intimacy between you and your partner. You don’t know much about them and their life.

You may also not feel comfortable sharing your own thoughts and feelings with them if you don’t trust them. It is important to show emotional vulnerability to your partner if you really want the relationship to work.

10. You Have Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

People have different ways of coping with breakups. If you have taken up drinking or seek solace in drugs, it is unhealthy. It starts off as recreational use to numb the pain. However, you can end up getting hooked on these habits. Excessive or addictive behaviors indicate underlying issues. They will create havoc in all aspects of your life, including your current relationship. If you continue with these addictions, they can derail your life in a major way.

A rebound relationship can be confusing as one partner still has feelings for their ex. It can lead to several problems and may end quickly. This type of relationship may work when both parties work on healing the pain associated with their past relationships. If you are thinking about your ex constantly, struggling to delete their photos, or checking up on them too often while being in a new relationship, chances are you are in a rebound relationship. Recovery from an old love is important before you find your new love to avoid the emotional rebound effect. That is why it is important to work on yourself before you transition and get into a new relationship.

Frequently Asked Questions

How long does a rebound relationship last?

Rebound relationships typically last between one and twelve months as such relationships are rarely based on compatibility and can be difficult to maintain beyond the infatuation stage. However, every relationship is unique and some rebound relationships may develop into stronger connections and last longer.

Why do rebounds feel like love?

Rebounds can feel like love as it helps put the grief and other difficult emotions from a breakup on the shelf and instead throws a lot of appreciation and affection toward a person with a broken heart. The sudden rush of affection, attention, and intimacy can feel like love to a person who has gone without for a while.

How do rebound relationships end?

Rebound relationships generally end on bitter notes, as one or both of the partners in such a relationship may lose attraction, get tired of compatibility issues, or go back to their ex.

Are rebound relationships intense?

Yes, rebound relationships can be very intense and move very fast. The intensity of a rebound may be a way to shut out unprocessed grief over the loss of the previous relationship.

There might be a sense of false security in jumping into a new relationship right after abreakup, but it is not healthy. Is it new love or a rebound relationship? Check out this comprehensive video and spot the signs.