How To Ask A Guy Out – 11 Creative Ways To Try

Fun and unique ways to get his attention and nudge your relationship ahead

Reviewed by Michele Waldron, Psy.D, LADC-I, CSCT Michele Waldron Michele WaldronPsy.D, LADC-I, CSCT facebook_iconlinkedin_iconinsta_icon
Written by , Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
Edited by , MA (English) Asmita De MA (English) linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Fact-checked by , MA Sangita Goel MA linkedin_icon Experience: 2 years
Last Updated on

So, a guy you are crushing on is giving you sleepless nights. Want a few tips on how to ask a guy out? You have come to the right place. It does not matter if you are in high school or a grown woman. Wanting to ask a guy out that you find cute can make your heart thump. It’s the 21st century, girl. It is okay if the guy does not make the first more. Forget the age-old gender roles. It’s time to take matters into your hands. Gone are the days of shy women who are asked out by a million men. You are a bold and beautiful modern woman with an abundance of confidence. Go and get what you want. Read on to learn how to ask a guy out!

Creative Ways To Ask A Guy Out

1. Write Him A Cute (Or Maybe Kind Of Cheesy) Poem

Write Him A Cute Or Maybe Kind Of Cheesy Poem
Image: Shutterstock

“Roses are red,

The sky is blue,

I think I am in trouble,

Because I really like you.”

If he can resist something so cute, girl, maybe he ain’t the one! You can make up your own silly poems that are personalized enough to make him blush.

2. Sing It, Girl!

If you are a good singer, host a karaoke party with your friends and your crush (tell him he will get free pizza. It will work 100%, we promise). When it is your turn to sing, choose a love song and sing it for him. If that doesn’t make it clear to him, nothing will. If you receive a favorable response (i.e., he blushes or smiles), ask him out on a date right before he leaves. Just remember – music is the language of love.

3. Ask Him Out On A Group Date

Couples on a group date
Image: Shutterstock

Many women — especially post-breakup — are too afraid to ask a guy out due to a fear of rejection. You may be a badass at work with great social skills or the outgoing, wild one in your friends’ group, but the idea of getting turned down is simply more than you can stand. You just can’t take the hit on her confidence. So, this is the perfect strategy for you. If you just can’t get over the fear of being rejected, invite him to go out in a group. It will look like a bunch of buddies are just having a night out. And, if it turns out that is all he wants — to be just friends — then that is okay, too. Just go out and have a good time. You may feel sad that he doesn’t have feelings for you, but you may just end up with a new friend. On the other hand, he may spend time with you and realize there’s some chemistry between the two of you. Either way, it is a complete win-win situation.

protip_icon Quick Tip
Make sure you invite him to a group that will get along with him and his character.

Ways To Ask A Guy Out Without Getting Rejected

4. Try The “I’ve Got an Extra Ticket” Trick

Try The Ive Got an Extra Ticket Trick
Image: Shutterstock

Asking a guy out directly may seem daunting, but trust us when we say it works. That includes the age-old trick guys have been using – “I have an extra ticket for this really cool event. Wanna go with me?” If you have seen the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days (if you haven’t, go watch it right now!), you will remember that Andie pulls the same trick for a highly-coveted basketball game. Could Benjamin resist? Of course not! But, do put some thought into what type of tickets you offer. Will he be interested in a Taylor Swift concert? (Only if he really likes you.) Otherwise, he will be more inclined to say ‘yes’ to going to a beer fest, a sporting event, or his favorite band’s concert. However, keep in mind that if he rejects your offer, you will be stuck with not one but two tickets, so make sure it is an event you really want to go to. Also, keep your BFF as a backup if your plan fails.

5. Leverage Your Mutual Interests

A guy in your friend circle is as into movies as you are. This could be an awesome opportunity for you to turn that obsession into a date. The smartest way to ask a guy out is by initiating communication in such a natural way that he has no clue you are asking him out. “So, they show ‘80s movies every Saturday at XYZ Theater. I heard that you are a movie buff, too. Interested?” Since you know he loves movies, there is a good chance that he will agree to go with you. You can try some really subtle flirting to let him know that you are interested and check if he reciprocates in some way.

Matthew Hussey, a YouTuber, recalls his experience when he had a talk with Tasha on his radio channel who wanted some tips on what to do when the guy she likes is shy. He tried to give insights as per his own behavioral patterns when it comes to relationships and even suggested some ways to take the next step forward. He suggests talking more, showing her attraction, and matching interests. He adds, “If he says I really wanna go see that film, you go, I have been waiting to see that film for weeks, we should go! (i)

protip_icon Quick Tip
Do some research and understand which genre he likes before you ask him out on a movie date.

6. Use A Terrible Pickup Line

This tip is great if you want to ask a guy out at a party or a bar – a person you don’t know yet. You want to start a conversation but also make an impression. Guys often deliver cheesy pickup lines to get girls, so why not try one on him yourself? “Do I know you? Because you look an awful lot like my next boyfriend.” “If you were a veggie, you would be a cute-cumber.” “Cool shirt. Is it made of boyfriend material?” “Shit, I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?”

You are not aiming to be smooth here, but to extract a laugh. Getting him to laugh will break the ice and make it easy for you to move in for the kill – uhhh, we mean, ask him out. At the very least, it will open the door for a conversation. You two can then try various pickup lines on each other and have a few laughs.

Ways To Invite A Guy Over Without Sounding Desperate

7. Buy Him A Drink

Here is another way to show interest in a guy and ask him out. This has been traditionally practiced by the guys, but there is no reason why you can’t. Send a drink over to a guy and give a confident head nod as the object of your interest looks up to see who sent him the Corona. This is not a common move used by women to woo men. This is precisely why it works so charmingly well! He will be so blown away by your confidence that he will walk over immediately and introduce himself. What will happen next, sexy diva, is completely up to you.

8. Have A Friend Talk To Him For You

If you are at a bar or a party, here is another good move. Women have been trying this since their school days because it works. Have your best friend go over to the guy you have been eyeing and ask him if he is single and ready to mingle. If he is, she can point you out and say a few nice things about you. You can pretend that you have no clue what is going on. Or, she can say: “My girlfriend can’t take her eyes off you, and I think she is being absolutely silly. Can I tell her you are absolutely not interested?” (Trying a little reverse psychology here). Or, maybe: “It is just me and my friend over there. Want to join us for a drink?” If he is with his friends, you can invite them all over. What guy can say ‘no’ to a tempting offer like that?

9. Ask Him Out For Coffee

Here is how to ask a man out without sounding desperate. Having coffee is such a mild activity that few people turn it down. If he is not into you and rejects the offer, all you have to say is, “Jeez. It’s just coffee and conversation. What did you think, I was proposing?” Bonus: He will feel like an idiot. (Insert evil laugh). Coffee is not a high-pressure situation. There is no great financial investment (something he may be afraid of) and no alcohol to make you do stupid stuff. And, it can easily be cut short! If things don’t go well, you can be in and out of there in under two hours. If it goes well, order another one!

10. Ask Him Out In Person

Ask Him Out In Person
Image: Shutterstock

Give careful thoughtto how you want to ask the guy out. You can send a text, a snap, a DM, etc. However, it’s more intimate to express interest face to face. Think of a time when you will be least anxious — at a bus stop, in front of your friends, after school, at lunch, etc. Find the time and place that works best for you. You can also practice in the mirror what you are going to say. It can be as simple as, “Would you like to see that new Marvel movie on Sunday?” Plan a specific activity on a specific day – don’t keep it vague. It is always a better idea to say, “Would you like to go grab a coffee this Saturday? How about at 4:30?” than “Let’s hang out some time.”

If he says yes, then yay! Make sure you plan the date well and follow through. This means deciding on a date, place, time, and activity. If he says no, you need to respect that too. A big part of asking someone out is honoring their consent. Just shrug and move on. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

11. How To Ask A Guy Out Over Text

Texting can be a challenge because it is hard to decipher intent and attitude. How can you know if he is really into you? Are words and emojis enough? It can be hard to understand if a man is into you via text. So, it is good to have at least a few video or voice calls beforehand so you can better understand his interest. But, if he is consistently texting you every day and generally seems engaged in the conversation, the signs look good. Here are some tips on how to ask a man out over text. Keep it short and simple. Just say: “Do you want to grab a coffee with me this weekend?” Then, wait. He may not have even seen your text, so don’t keep blabbering – it is embarrassing. Try being cute. Try this: “Would you like to go out on a date with me? Text Y or N.”

Infographic: First Date Tips

Well, if the stars are aligned, you will land a date for sure. And when you do, you must be aware of the dos and don’ts of your first date. Be you, of course, but make sure the day goes well.

Check out the infographic below to learn a few tips.

first date tips (infographic)

Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team

A modern-day woman does not have to wait around for their love interest to take the first step and ask them out on a date. Instead, they are fiercely confident and can take the matter into their hands to land the date she desires! The above list helps make your task easier by providing solutions for all scenarios. For example, you can ask a guy out without the fear of rejection by inviting them to an event or concert, saying you have an extra ticket, or planning an activity around your mutual interests.

However, an occasional rejection is unavoidable, and you should take it in your stride instead of letting it weigh on your self-esteem. The guy might be dating someone, be in a relationship already, or going through a difficult time in his personal life, stopping him from venturing into dating. Just adjust your crown, accept that he was not the one, and move on. Finally, success is right around the corner if you have the confidence to approach your perfect guy.

Have you ever asked a guy out? Share your experience in the comments section down below!

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you ask a guy out without sounding desperate?

Just have a casual talk, compliment something about him, make it all about you, and flirt your way up.

Is it OK for a girl to ask a guy out?

Yes. It is OK for a girl to ask a guy out. Ask him on a fun or casual date like going out for a movie or concert or doing some sports.

How to ask a guy for a date if he lives away?

If the guy lives away, you can ask for a casual meet-up as friends whenever he is in your town. You can also try online dating and ask him for a virtual date. You will also be able to gauge his body language while video chatting and see if he is interested in you or not.

How can I gauge if the guy is interested in me before asking him out?

Look out for signs to understand if he is also interested in you. If a boy likes you, he is likely to frequently give you compliments, make frequent eye contact, flirt with you, notice your dresses, call or send you messages, or playfully irritate you.

How can I make sure that asking a guy out doesn’t damage our friendship?

If you are planning to ask your childhood friend on a date, make it subtle and look out for hints to know if he feels the same way or simply wants to remain friends.

Key Takeaways

  • Asking a guy out can be cumbersome, given the nervousness you encounter. But with courage and a positive attitude, you can do it almost effortlessly.
  • Writing a poem, singing a song, or planning a group date can work wonders for asking a guy out.
  • Make sure you and the guy are comfortable hanging out together.
how to ask a guy out

Image: Stable Diffusion/StyleCraze Design Team

Are you ready to take the plunge and ask out that special guy? Check out this video for the best 6 ways to get him to go out with you!

Personal Experience: Source

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Michele Waldron
Michele WaldronPsy.D, LADC-I, CSCT
Dr. Waldron is a licensed clinical psychologist, certified couples counselor, licensed alcohol and drug counselor, and sex therapist. with 16 years of experience. She received her Psy.D from Antioch University, New England.

Read full bio of Michele Waldron
Sneha Tete
Sneha TeteBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Sneha has a master's degree in Applied Linguistics from the University of Hyderabad, a professional Relationship Coach diploma, and over four years of experience in writing. She writes about relationships and lifestyle.Sneha began her career as an instructional designer, shifted to freelance technical and research writing, and self-published a novella on the theme of adolescent mental health.

Read full bio of Sneha Tete
Asmita De
Asmita DeAssociate Editor
Asmita De is an associate editor with over three years of experience. She graduated in English Literature from the University of Calcutta. She has collaborated with several digital companies and reputed publishing houses as an editor.

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Sangita Goel
Sangita GoelBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Sangita is a content writer with a passion for exploring diverse genres. She has written 100+ blogs on an array of topics, including relationships, travel, beauty, and fashion. Armed with a master’s degree in history from Indira Gandhi National Open University, she has leveraged her curiosity to write captivating, engaging, and informative articles.

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