Dear Nosy Neighbors, Please Stop Asking Me These 9 Questions

Written by Niharika Nayak

While the Bible tells us to “love thy neighbor”, it isn’t that easy when the neighbor is nothing but nosy and annoying. Yes, you know exactly what I’m talking about. No, I’m not talking about that neighbor who plays loud music till 10 pm at night. Neither are we talking about that neighbor who stops by every now and then and asks for sugar/milk. We are talking about the neighbor who cares a bit too much about our lives instead of their own. He/she is quick to jump to conclusions about you and your life and you didn’t even ask for it. And if there are rumors about you flying around in the locality, well we can be almost certain that it is the doing of this creature. Though it would have been so very convenient to avoid and ignore them completely, at times that may not be possible due to various reasons. Here are nine common things nosy neighbors would blurt out we wished they didn’t:

1. “Who Was That Guy With You?”

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My parents know who I’m hanging out with, and also I am a consenting adult. So how is it any of your business which guy I choose to acquaint myself with? Do you know who your own kids are hanging out with? If not, then maybe you should focus on your own kids’ life rather than spying on mine.

As adults, we all have our personal space and people we like to hang out with. And no one should deem it their responsibility to tag who is fit or unfit to hang out with us. We choose our own friends, and it’s certainly not necessary that the whole neighborhood should be familiar with them.

2. “What Are Your Career Plans?”

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“Oh uncle, do you have a job lined up for me?” If not, then my career plans are none of your business. My career plans are nobody’s business but my own. It’s really nosy for you to ask such questions if we don’t know each other or speak on a regular basis. Besides, many of us young people are still experimenting with our lives and trying to figure out what best suits us. Let’s give each other some breather and not put any undue pressure.

3. “Why Does Your Dog Bark So Much?”

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Well, she’s a dog. Do you expect her to meow instead? Or maybe I should go ask her why she’s barking so loud and take her out for drinks to cheer her up? My dog barking is probably the only thing keeping robbers away from exploring that house of yours. Also, most dogs do not bark unnecessarily. Maybe you spooked her, and that’s why she’s barking. Either way, I cannot change her nature. Get some earplugs.

4. “Are You Really Going To Wear “THAT”?

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Oh no. Is my miniskirt stained? Why is it any of your concern what I am wearing? Do I judge you for your bland and generic taste in fashion? If you can’t handle someone showing a bit of skin, maybe you should stay indoors rather than ogle at them and moral police their outfit. It’s silly to expect everyone to dress how you please, and you have no right to control how another person dresses.

5. “Why Don’t You Visit Us More Often?”

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Maybe because I don’t enjoy your company? Pushing someone to come and visit you is so ridiculous when they are clearly not interested in doing so! I would rather spend my time studying or reading and gaining insightful knowledge than pretending to be someone I’m not just to appease you.

6. “When Are You Getting Married?”

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This is such a rude question to ask someone! Even if I was getting married, I would not bother telling you about it because you would most likely not be invited to the wedding. My wedding is nobody’s concern but my own. Just because your son probably got married young does not mean that I have to follow the same path.

7. “How Much Is Your Salary?”

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“Okay Auntie, did I ever ask you about your salary? Then why are you so concerned about mine?” There’s nothing more intrusive than random strangers asking you about your salary. And we know well enough that the motive behind this question is to compare them with their own kids or someone else’s kids. Comparisons like these are so out of place. Different professions have different levels of earnings and you can’t just compare people’s achievements from how much salary they earn. What someone else makes is none of your business unless you are looking to hire them right now. And even then, you don’t just blatantly pop this question!

8. “What’s Your Rent Like?”

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Again, how much I pay in rent is none of your concern unless you will be paying my rent for me. It’s crazy how people think this is an appropriate question to ask someone. It’s like me going up to them and asking them how much it cost to buy their home. It’s appalling how people think asking about rent and other expenses is an appropriate question.

9. “Do Your Parents Know You Are Friends With Someone Of “XYZ” Religion?”

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Firstly, my parents aren’t judgemental like you, and they really don’t care who I choose to hang out with as long as they aren’t bad people. Why should I only be friends with people who follow the same religion as me? Life would be so bland if we only stuck to our own community or socio-economic background. Whether I am friends with someone from X religion or Y religion is none of your concern.

Sometimes the best thing to do is to ignore the person or just make a blanket statement when they ask you certain questions that are too intrusive. We understand that you would rather not burn your bridges with these neighbors as you may need their help sometimes, but some questions are just off limits! Do let us know all of your thoughts on this article in the comment section below!

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