Birthdays: Is It Just Me Or Are Birthdays Generally Depressing?
chaitra krishnanMA (Journalism & Mass Communication) Experience: 5 yearsChaitra has a triple main bachelor’s degree in journalism, communicative English, and economics from St. Aloysius College, Mangalore, and a master’s degree in journalism and mass communication from St... more
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When you think about birthdays, what are the images that come to your mind? Cakes, chocolates, balloons, gifts, a room full of people singing a birthday song. And, of course, a happy you. This is what birthdays sound like to most people. But there are others, like me, who feel that birthdays are absolutely depressing. Instead of being one of the happiest days of your life, birthdays become a sob fest for many owing to several reasons. We don’t like birthdays doesn’t mean that we are killjoys or that we don’t like to have fun. It’s just that birthdays come with a lot of mental baggage that we certainly don’t want to open up about. Also, some of us really want to celebrate our birthdays and be happy (who doesn’t?). But, there are certain things that pull us away from the thought of having a happy birthday.
Birthday blues are very common, and if you don’t like your birthdays, know that you’re not alone in this. Also, if any of your close ones say that they don’t like their birthdays, be supportive and spend time with them on the day. Now, let’s dive in, shall we?
1. Terrible Things Happened During Your Past Birthdays
If you have experienced some form of trauma — physical, mental, or emotional, on your birthday, you might end up hating the day. Every year, along with your birthday, all those bad memories start creeping up in your mind and they disturb you greatly. These things could have happened when you were just a child or they might have happened more recently. Nonetheless, a breakup, someone’s demise, an accident, an emotional heartbreak, or even a quarrel with someone can become the cause for you to hate your birthdays. And, if something has happened more than once on different birthdays of yours, you might end up fearing the day and the bad luck that comes with it.
2. You Realize How Alone You Are
Not everyone is a party person and not everyone lives physically close to their family and friends. If you are in a different city or country and you really don’t have any plans for your birthday, you may feel blue. You know that your loved ones can send you gifts or video call you, but they can’t be with you on your special day. This means no cake, no celebration, and no room full of laughter. Yes, it’s sad that you spend your birthday alone and it hurts you deeply. So, to avoid getting hurt, you come up with a new policy of not expecting anything from anyone. “I don’t care if anyone turns up for my birthday”, “what’s so special about birthdays anyway?” and “birthdays are just normal days” are ideas that you come up with to console yourself.
3. People Keep Asking What’s Special When Nothing Really Is
Even if somehow you convince yourself that you’re going to be fine and you won’t give in to the birthday blues, there will be people who will text or call to wish you and ask you about your “birthday plans.” People! This is like rubbing salt on someone’s wounds. If you feel that your friend is going to be alone on his/her birthday, please go meet them. For some reason, if you can’t go meet them, at least stop asking them what they’re doing.
4. You Hate The Thought That You’re Growing Old
Birthdays get scarier once you cross the 25th year mark. You’re growing older! Your skin becomes wrinkly and your hair is getting grey. This might sound super negative, but a lot of us hate growing old. Even though we preach that aging is natural, we always feel a bit weird when we see the undesirable changes in our body.
5. You Haven’t Achieved Your Goals
Remember how Rachel Green from Friends freaked out about not having any of her goals accomplished, on her 30th birthday? Many of us feel sad when we haven’t gotten that perfect job, or gotten engaged, or haven’t had babies by a certain age, don’t we? And your birthday is the perfect reminder to bring those dreadful thoughts back to your mind. And also, let’s not forget your parents and uninvited aunts who keep reminding you of how old you are and that you need to get all these things done ASAP.
6. Everybody, Including You, Is Busy
If you are busy preparing for an examination or if you have an important meeting at work that you cannot skip, you will have to sacrifice the day. This makes you hate your birthday because you know you won’t get to do any of the birthday stuff and you’ll simply have to sit at your desk working on that exhausting project. And if your friends are busy, there no question of going out and even getting a drink, right?
Now, this whole article may have sounded a tad bit pessimistic but that is the reality. Many of us do feel this way about our birthdays and it is sad. If you are one among these people, try to make plans. Go out there and have fun on your birthday. Your birthdays are important and so are you! Do you love your birthdays? Share your thoughts with us in the comments section below.
