So, let’s be honest here, Beyoncé got it right.
Who runs the world?
(Author’s note: If you answered differently, be warned this article may not be for you. Also, you’re missing out on great music.)
We’re beautiful, bold, deliciously complicated, and unapologetically intelligent creatures, and there ain’t no man in the world who can ever tell us anything different. That being said (being the amazingly intuitive beings that we are), we’re also well aware that we’re not perfect. We make mistakes. And sometimes, these mistakes can very well be in bed. Cue: horror music. Yes, we’re totally talking about it. (Geez, didn’t you read the title?) When it comes to making love, you may not be a sex goddess. So, the question is, why not? Well, read to discover the top 10 mistakes we all make in bed:
1. Being Too Conscious
When a man’s making love to you, he’s usually so excited at the prospect of finally being with you that he doesn’t really care about how you look. If you are perpetually plagued by worries of how you appear, your bad sides and your good… well, your self-consciousness is only going to ruin the pleasure for you both. So, get rid of those insecurities woman, cause he doesn’t care, and you shouldn’t too!
2. Being Way Too Submissive
While we may find men who take charge and woo and seduce us extremely sexy, men can find the same trait in us incredibly sensual as well. A man loves a woman who can actually let go of her inhibitions and surprise him in bed. So, though it may be tempting to let him take the lead every time, resist it. Trust us, you’ll have a lot of fun as well.
3. Being Way Too Critical
Constructive criticism is good, but beware of being overly critical as that is just a turn-off. Letting your man know your likes and dislikes in bed is a part of healthy communication between couples – however, try not to go overboard. Sometimes, you may also want to wait and discuss it with him later if you believe it will ruin the mood.
4. Being Too Comfortable
So you’ve been together for a while now. Make that a long, long while. You guys are way past the stage of being embarrassed in front of each other. Remember how you pecked on a salad during your first date? Now you eat even his share of barbecue wings, because he’s long discovered the giant vortex that is your appetite and you no more cringe at the thought of him discovering your real karaoke voice. Though being comfortable in your skin when you’re around your man is definitely a good thing, being way too comfortable, however, is a problem. Being comfy doesn’t mean you shouldn’t even bother and just go for it in your granny panties and worn out old bra. Try to make the encounters more enticing – your man will surely thank you for it.
5. Pillow Talk
Your man just expended a vast amount of energy trying to please you and though you may want to cuddle and chat, he may not be so inclined to. Don’t get mad though, it’s not that he’s pulling away from you. According to a study conducted by Neuroscience and Biobehavioral Reviews, a man’s brain is strangely designed to ‘conk off’ after a love making session.His prefrontal cortex, associated with logic, memory, consciousness, and reason, simply ‘switches off’ (1)! Huh. You learn something new every day.
6. Being Quiet
If you enjoy something, then let him know. One of the biggest turn offs for men is trying to make love to an someone unresponsive. Don’t be quiet; you’re not in church for crying out loud. Groan, moan, and talk dirty. Let him know what he’s doing right, for that will spur him on further. And girl, those profits are going to all be reaped by you. You’re welcome.
7. Being Too Timid
Still getting busy under the literal sheets or in the dark? Well, come on. Now that you are already doing the dirty deed, you might as well do it properly. You’re way past the first base, so there’s no point of you getting shy now! Stop trying to hide in the shadows, or the sheets, and get rid of your inhibitions and try something new!
8. Being In A Rush
You’re both excited, and the passion is scorching hot. But don’t just assume that he may want to take things fast. Instead, take your time and invest in taking it slow. Explore every inch of his body – touch, taste, and discover. He will love you for it and be sure to pay you back.
9. Being, Well, Not So Hygienic
Lack of hygiene can be a major turn off. For both men and women. So, if you’re getting lax with any of your daily hygiene practices, then be ready to get some criticism that may hurt your feelings or even worse, receive passive aggressive treatment. Before getting busy under the sheets, always check for any body odor, sweat or hair.
10. Don’t Fake It
In a strange way, if you decide to ‘fake it’, you’re sort of cheating him. Patience is a virtue. Don’t think he’s unskillful or incapable. Be honest, communicate with him and give the man a chance!
Now that you know the top ten mistakes to avoid making in bed, there’s nothing stopping you from having a flawless and mind-blowing sex life!