It is easy to believe that life is a fairy tale when you are a child. The more you grow, the more you are influenced by romantic books and movies that promote the notion of “happily ever after.” While most headstrong teens are focused on finding the perfect match, the reality is that it is not subjected to teenagers and adolescents alone. Sadly, the world is full of people who are fanatically looking for their better half who will magically take all their miseries away. Unfortunately, while choosing someone made for you, we often are stuck with real-life Dementors who make you unhappy. True, love is blind, and it can curb your ability to spot obvious red flags your partner exhibits which you only notice after the spark in the relationship fades.
Here are some common signs that you are stuck in a not-so-happy relationship and need to get yourself together immediately:
1. Communication Gap
Does it take you a while to open up to your spouse or discuss sensitive topics? Communication breakdowns are an indication of a lack of understanding. Communication is a two-way street, and it’s crucial to remember that. Both partners should be able to freely express their feelings without fear of being judged. Your partner’s inability or unwillingness to speak with you might be a big red flag.
2. Disrespecting Boundaries
Not respecting boundaries is another warning indicator that your spouse doesn’t respect you and doesn’t give you the space you need. Our comfort level with particular conversations and situations depends on boundaries in our relationships. When a line is crossed, it might have negative consequences on us.
3. Lack Of Trust
The cornerstone of a strong relationship is trust. If you suspect your spouse of being dishonest or disloyal, this is a significant red flag. Mutual trust is an essential component of respect.
4. It’s Hard To Put Your Faith In
What is the state of your relationship with your partner? If you’re not sure,this might be a warning sign as well. A partner’s inability to be totally committed to the relationship might indicate that they are unable to put their trust in the other person. Before deciding to embark on a long-term relationship, they may have to deal with other issues in their own life.
5. Over Controlling
An indication of controlling conduct is if your partner tries to cause a rift between your social circle, family, or work. They may also try to influence where you go or who you spend time with. Insecurity and envy are common causes of manipulative conduct. It is unhealthy when your spouse cannot accept how your lives are intertwined and seeks to alter them.
6. Family And Friends Are Worried
We may overlook warning signals because we are so committed to our relationships. But there’s no harm in listening to the concerns of your loved ones if they have them. While hearing criticism might be difficult, it’s important to remember that those who criticize you have your best interests at heart and have legitimate concerns.
7. Reminiscing About Former Relationships
How often does your spouse bring up their previous relationship? Unresolved dynamics or sentiments may be to blame for this. Perhaps your partner blames a previous relationship for all of their troubles. Their behavior suggests that they haven’t dealt with their prior relationship maturely.
8. They Affect Your Self-Esteem
Any time you feel insecure about yourself because of something your partner said or did, add another red flag in your relationship. Sarcasm, gaslighting, or degrading you in jest are all ways they might make you feel uneasy or nervous. In a relationship, you should not feel insulted or pushed down.
9. Compromise Or Apologies Are Not Theirs To Do
If your spouse refuses to work with you or accept responsibility, this is a significant red flag. Relationships necessitate a sense of responsibility and accountability for one another’s conduct. Sincere apologies are better than “I’m sorry you feel that way,” which is not a true apology. No partner can ever be perfect, but they should be prepared to compromise.
10. Abusive Behavior
Finally, abusive conduct is the most significant warning signal. Verbal, emotional, and physical abuse are all examples of this. Tolerating this conduct is never a good idea since it might put the individual experiencing it in danger.
It’s up to you to decide how to handle the red flags based on the type, severity, and your own limits. If your relationship is still not improving despite your best efforts, it may be time to stop things to protect your mental health and well-being. However, it is never too late to start new, and thinking about your own peace does not make you selfish. It is never easy to walk out of a relationship, and it is easier said than done, but you are stronger than you know. Have your friends and family by your side, and always remember that you will be very proud of yourself a few months down the line.