7 Secret Fears 90 Percent Of Men Never Talk About

Men have a terrible lot in life, don’t you think? On one hand, they are always at the receiving end of all the feminist debates, and on the other, they also have to constantly portray themselves as the strong, dependable figures who don’t break even in the face of extreme circumstances. They can never afford to have a chink in their armor.

But what about their hopes, and fears? Nobody cares about that, right? It’s men’s world after all, what do they have to fear?

If one wants to be true to the feminist movement, then this line of thought is something we need to move away from. And in the spirit of that, we decided to document some of the most common fears that most men out there experience, but never talk about. Here’s what they fear:

1. They Too Are Body-Conscious

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While body-shaming and body positivity are promoted as women-centric issues, men too, are often measured against very unrealistic standards set by the media. If you’re thinking of coming back with the retort, “What about Dad-bod? That is where a less-than-ideal body type is not only celebrated but also held up as something desirable.” Well, then I would ask you to think of your average Joe, do you think he would be considered hot, with a dad-bod? No, right? Not everyone can be Chris Pratt!

2. They Worry About Their Responsibility As The Breadwinners

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While women are still fighting to achieve the respect and esteem associated with the status of a breadwinner, men often crumble under the pressure of that role.

Imagine a scenario where every minuscule decision of yours has larger ramifications on your family. Stressful, isn’t it? Now imagine growing up with that philosophy ingrained in your brain. Too much pressure, isn’t it?

3. Their Height

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Being vertically-challenged is every man’s worst dream come true. In a society where attributes like height, the tenor of voice, etc. are often seen as markers of masculinity, being shorter than the “norm” is simply not acceptable. Also, popular opinions such as the one that says girls go for taller guys, create all the more stigma around the concept of a “less-than-usual” height.

4. Being Perceived As Weak

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You must’ve read that popular Twitter thread where a man says that whenever his wife is angry at him, he just tightens the lids on all the jars. As a result, the wife has to come and ask for his help and he gets in her good books by being her strong savior. If being strong is a prerequisite for being considered a man, is it any surprise that the men strongly fear being perceived as weak? No, right?

5. Their Hair

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Male-pattern baldness is a well-documented phenomenon, it’s not a psychological fear that just exists in the minds of men. While on one hand men with thick hair and beard are celebrated as the ideals of masculinity, on the other hand, male-pattern baldness is a reality they have to contend with.

Also, too much hair is a problem too. We are talking about body hair. That again is a biological fact for most men, but it doesn’t help that it is also perceived as highly unattractive!

6. Being Inexperienced In Their Relationship

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Be it in a formal ballroom dance or the bedroom, men are expected to always take the lead. In this scenario, being inexperienced can cost them dearly, in terms of their reputation as well as their self-esteem. In fact, men fear being perceived wrongly in relationships as much as, if not more, than women.

What can you do to soothe this fear? Be open and frank in all communications with your man. Give him the chance to share his deepest concerns with you.

7. Expressing Their Emotions

Most men grow up listening to slogans such as, “Real men don’t cry” or “Mard ko dard nahi hota” (Real men don’t feel pain). It is drilled into their heads that expressing, or even processing emotions is a sign of weakness.

This often leads them to repress their emotions so much so that they come out in ways that are often disastrous for them as well as those surrounding them. Therefore, the correct way would be to asking them to express their emotions so that it doesn’t contribute to their mental health issues.

So yes, men have their fears too. Let’s just be more accepting of them and give them a chance to air out their concerns as well. If you have a man in your life, then be there for him. Tell him that it’s okay to have vulnerabilities and that he doesn’t have to portray a strong front all the time.

Do you yourself have any secret fears? Or do the men in your life have similar doubts?

Share your opinions in the comments section.

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