Want Some Magic in Your Marriage? Try Appreciating Your Husband

By Bency Sebastian

Marriage is a partnership rather than just a relationship. It is important to build a life around companionship, compromise, and understanding with the partner you’ve decided to spend the rest of your life with. It is unfair on your part to expect them to be a certain way or act a certain way to suit your idea of an ideal partner. For a successful long-term marriage, it is important to accept and love your partner for who they are rather than what you want them to be. Although this holds true for both, a wife and a husband, the key factor here is that the way a man functions and the way a woman functions are very different.

There are patterns that male energies follow and different energies that feminine energies follow and understanding this key characteristic can help create some magic in your marriage. In our society, women are considered fragile but there is nothing more fragile than the male ego. Just like women, men want to be appreciated and respected by their wives too but unlike wives, their egos have to be stroked constantly and every task has to be considered an achievement. Men feel valued and respected when they are appreciated and this might surprise you but the goal of a good husband is to please his wife. The real trouble comes when husbands feel like their wives cannot be pleased and so they stop trying. That is when the marriage is in trouble.

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From what we know about men, the most important things that they look for in a relationship are respect, care and companionship, and the freedom to be themselves. As a wife, it is important to cater to your husband’s needs and understand his desires. A happy marriage includes a happy couple and even though there will be days when you will fight with your better half, if there is respect and understanding between the two of you, the fights will pass and you will grow closer to each other.

How To Appreciate Him

Husbands like to feel important and valued. They want to feel like their wife needs them and probably will not be able to survive without him because this helps inflate their egos. As much as this might not be true, it is essential to make your husband feel needed once in a while. For example, when the two of you are out grocery shopping, allow him to carry the bags because it makes him feel stronger. Even if you do not mind carrying the bags, allowing him to do so makes him feel like a good husband.

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Learning to admire the qualities of your husband is important. For instance, your man might be intelligent, hard-working, attentive to detail, romantic and disciplined but reminding him that these qualities are what you admire in him boosts his confidence and strokes his ego. It makes him happy knowing that his wife sees him for his good qualities and appreciates it. When your husband feels appreciated, he tends to give back tenfold which is an advantage for you (wink wink).

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As much as they deny this, every husband likes to feel special. From time to time, it is important to do something out of the ordinary to make your husband feel extraordinary. Writing him letters or small cute notes, surprising him with gifts, cooking him his favorite meal, trying that adventurous move in bed (ladies, you know what I’m talking about, that one thing you’ve been trying to avoid) or it could be planning a boys night for him with his friends. These little gestures go a long way with your hubby. He will appreciate you for it and enjoy the attention that he claims not to care about.

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As ironic as it is, another way to appreciate him is by giving him the freedom and space to be himself. Giving him the time to pursue his hobbies and a break from carrying out his duties as a husband can be a great way to let him know that you understand him. You know what I’m talking about… you’ve been telling your husband to fix that particular light bulb for some time now but he has not done it and every time you wanted to do it, he told you not to because he would. And now it has been over a month. Even though this can be annoying, sometimes it is very important to let him be and stop nagging him. As difficult as it might seem, giving him his space will reverse what you have been trying to do and who knows, he might just fix that light bulb.

Create And Retain The Magic

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The thing about marriage is that it is a bed of roses for the first year or two but spending so much time with one person tends to become overwhelming. It is important to compromise on the little things to keep both you and your husband happy and the fire in your marriage burning. Most marriages tend to lose out on the passion after a couple of years but to rekindle that fire is an important aspect of creating the magic that was once present. These small steps can help preserve the magic between you and your husband making your marriage, not just a successful one but also a happy one. What do you do to keep the fire in your marriage burning? Let us know in the comments below.

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Writer, dreamer and a moon child. Bency believes that music, words, and little precious moments of life add color to... more

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