What, In My Opinion, Really Is Feminism?
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I had never heard the term Feminism before I went to college. It was probably my second day in college when I was introduced to this term. The more I got to know about it, the more I felt heard. All the concerns I had, everything that I thought was wrong in the world, all of this was being discussed here. Today, I can proudly say that I am a feminist.
So, What Really Is Feminism For Me?
Well, first things first, it definitely does not mean men-hating. Yes, I am a feminist, but no, I don’t hate men. At the risk of sounding like a cliché, Feminism for me has always meant equality. Equal chances or opportunities for both the sexes.
I know a lot of card-carrying members of Feminism who might disagree with this thought. For them, men are the root cause of everything evil in this world. However, I don’t think so. According to me, men need this movement as much as we women do.
Do Men Need Feminism?
They are also denied opportunities just like we are. How else do you explain a maternity leave of 6 months and a paternity leave that ranges anywhere between 6-10 days? Men need to and of course, they want to spend time with their new-born child as much as the women.
Before I get accused of being a part of the patriarchy, I agree that the world has mostly been unfair to women. When we work, we get paid less. If we choose to be home-makers, then the society looks down upon us. If we dare to choose both, home and office, then it becomes our responsibility to make sure we manage the home as well. Feminism for me is the answer to all these issues and the way forward to a more equitable society.
Equal Opportunities For Both The Genders
I had a friend whose mother was a senior official in the foreign ministry and his father was a homemaker. To me, this did not seem odd at all, but every time this fact was brought up in a conversation, people used to have ten different questions for my poor friend. “Why is he a homemaker? Couldn’t he find a job?” or “How is he comfortable with living on your mother’s salary?” These were the questions that always plagued him. Had the situation been the opposite of this no one would have ever thought of asking these questions. For the world, a woman being a breadwinner is hard to digest, but a man being a homemaker is an even more difficult concept for the people to understand.
Feminism taught me to question this. It taught me that both the genders were equally equipped to handle these responsibilities. It also taught me that biology had no role to play in this, it’s nothing but a myth. Men and women, both, deserve a chance to prove their mettle, in every field. There is no such thing as women being more suited to domestic roles and men having a natural aptitude for “dynamic” professions.
The Freedom To Make Choices
Feminism, for me, meant the freedom to make my own choices and chart my own course of life. These choices would include even those which are available to men. Similarly, men should have the freedom to make their own choices. If I want to be a homemaker, I should not be looked down upon, nor should a man be ridiculed, if he chooses to do the same. These choices also had to do with my body. If I do not want to have a kid, I should not be judged as unwomanly. And if I do become a mother, I should not be made to live a life that revolves just around my kids. Feminism is a chance for me to live life king size, literally.
However, with the freedom to make choices, I also have to bear the responsibility for my actions. So, if I expect my partner to share the chores at home and also be a responsible parent, then I also have to share his economic responsibilities. You cannot have your cake and eat it too. As Spiderman said, with great power comes great responsibility, right?
Feminism might have begun as a political movement, but today, it signifies the abundance of opportunities for everyone. It gives you the chance to do what you want to, in the way you want (but responsibly). It teaches us to be more tolerant of the differences that we might have amongst ourselves. It urges us to move beyond traditional gender roles and be more open to change.
It is not written in stone that women and men cannot adapt to each other’s role in society. If anything, both the genders should help each other in doing so. Feminism is not the dreaded “F” word as it is made out to be. What do you think about Feminism? Let us know in the comments below.
