How To Talk To Girls: 5 Easy Ways To Start A Conversation

Ideas to help you fathom her expectations when you aim to begin with a lasting impression

Reviewed by Ronald Hoang, Relationship & Family Counselor Ronald Hoang Ronald HoangRelationship & Family Counselor linkedin_iconyoutube_icon
Written by , Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
Edited by , MA (English) Asmita De MA (English) linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Fact-checked by , MA Gracia Odile MA linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Last Updated on

Starting a conversation with a girl is tricky, especially when trying to talk with her for the first time. If you are feeling shy and thinking about how to talk to girls, this post is for you. This article explores some expert tips on how to impress a girl with your conversation and mistakes to avoid while interacting with girls. Scroll down for more information.

Ways To Start A Conversation With a Girl

How to start a conversation with a girl
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Once you have overcome the initial hesitation, follow these simple tips to start a conversation with a girl:

1. Ask About Her Day And Listen To What She Says

When you are looking for things to talk about, the best way is to be curious about her. Ask what she did, how she spent her day, and how she felt.

Show your interest in her likes and dislikes. Talk about things that interest her and develop a genuine curiosity about her life.

However, ensure that you do not get too personal.

protip_icon Quick Tip
Ask open-ended questions to encourage detailed responses and to keep the conversation flowing. Have a relaxed and authentic approach when striking up a conversation.

2. Talk About Hobbies And Interests

Talk about your hobbies and interests while talking to a girl
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Hobbies are often a big part of who a person is. It shows how they like to spend their free time and what they love to do. A conversation about something a girl loves will automatically be interesting and upbeat.

While knowing about her hobbies, you might discover that you may have similar interests. If not, you can always learn or try something new.

3. Talk About Her Experiences

Talking to a girl about things she has done is a great way to get to know her closely, and it, in turn, helps her get to know you too.
Is she a solo traveler? Why not strike a conversation about the places she has visited? Is she an adventure sports freak? Why not talk about the craziest thing she has ever tried? Try this, and we bet you will never have a dull conversation with her!

4. Ask About Her Family And Friends

Ask about her family and friends while talking to a girl
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If you are looking for a great topic to start a conversation with the girl that can almost fill up an entire conversation, there is nothing better than the topic of family and friends. Everyone has a unique family history, which gives you a lot to talk about and learn a great deal about her. It will also give you an idea about her background and family values.

5. Ask About Her

Another great conversation starter is to encourage her to talk about herself. Showing interest in her as a person will make her feel comfortable and open up to you to share.

Take your cues from what she says and ask new questions and responses to keep the conversation going.
So, you have a fair idea of how to start a conversation with a girl. However, to keep it going, you will have to come up with topics. If you have the same dilemma, here are some of the simple yet fun topics to build a conversation with a girl.

Things To Talk About With Girls

Things to talk about with a girl
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1. Traveling

You can talk about anything travel-related to strike a great conversation. But, first, find out if she is interested in traveling. If yes, then you can talk about anything – her dream destination, places she has traveled to, her next travel goals, or crazy and fun anecdotes.

2. Books, Movies, Or Music

You can talk about her favorite books, authors, genres, movies, or music interests. This will help you figure out if you both have things in common.

3. School Or Place Of Work

Ask her about her schooling, place of work, profile, what she did during college, and so on.

4. Goals And Dreams

This is another interesting area to start building a conversation. You can ask her about what she dreams of doing in the future, what goals she has set for life, and more.

5. Ethics

Discussing one’s ethics and morals is also important, whether the one you are conversing with happens to be a boy or girl. Ensure to approach the conversation with respect and open-mindedness. Share your thoughts on moral principles and values, while also encouraging her to express her perspectives.

6. Future Plans

While you may have already talked about her goals and aspirations, knowing about her immediate plans can also help you understand her better. You can open up a positive and engaging conversation with a question like, ‘Are there any exciting plans you are working on or something you can see yourself doing in the near future?’

These are some of the topics that you can start talking about. You have to find hooks in the conversation to keep it going. If all goes well, you may end up exchanging numbers and even bag a second date! However, you may feel like texting her or strike a conversation via text. If you are wondering how often you should poke or text a girl without sounding too clingy, keep reading.

How Often Should You Keep In Contact With A Girl?

How often should you keep in contact with a girl
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When you are trying to impress a girl over texts, you may wonder:

  • Are you contacting or texting her enough?
  • What do instant replies mean?
  • How much texting is enough?

The question comes down to how often you should contact a girl to keep her in contact with you. To help you navigate this dilemma, here are some tips to help you strike the right balance:

1. Stay In Touch

Texting a girl soon after you get her number is a great start point to build contacts. If you do not text her, she may think that you are not interested and may get over you before she is even into you.

So, whether you get a girl’s number online or in person, make sure to text her within the first few hours on the pretext of sharing your number with her. When she responds, make it a point to take the conversation forward right there because if you let the opportunity go, it can then be very hard to break the ice later.

protip_icon Trivia
Ask her out on a cozy coffee date, explore a museum or library, or try out a new restaurant. You can tailor the plan according to her or a common interest to show consideration and thoughtfulness.

2. Avoid Texting Immediately After The Date

Avoid texting immediately after a date
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A good rule of thumb here is never to miss texting her soon after a date. However, do not do it immediately after you said bye, or you might seem desperate.

Instead, the better strategy is to wait for a few hours and then send a short and intimate text letting her know that you enjoyed her company today. Give her and yourself enough time to process the experience before making any further plans.

3. Do Not Text Her Every Day

Whether you can text a girl every day depends largely on what stage of the relationship you both are in. If you are still not dating officially, do not text a girl every day. Instead, it is better to go slow and time your texts. You have to decide the frequency depending on her responses. Otherwise, things may go downhill pretty soon.

In the next section, we have discussed some common mistakes to avoid while interacting with a girl.

Mistakes To Avoid While Interacting With Girls

Mistakes to avoid while talking to a girl
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1. Unnecessary Flaunting

If you fail to impress her at the moment, it is more or less the end of the story. Therefore, make sure not to flaunt unnecessarily in front of a girl. Whether it is about your wealth, the number of girls who were crazy for you, or any other thing for that matter, flaunting is a strict no-no while interacting with girls.

2. Making Her Feel Jealous

This is an age-old strategy that does not work anymore. Remember that if she is not attracted to you or not paying attention to you under normal circumstances, the chances are high she will not pay attention to you if you try to make her jealous.

Making a girl feel jealous is a poor way of trying to make her notice you. If she wants to be with you and is attracted to you, she will pay attention anyway.

3. Insisting Her To Do Something

Do not insist her to do something while talking to a girl
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Never insist on your date to do anything against her wish. Whether it is about visiting a place, doing an activity, or staying overnight – if she is not interested, do not force and insist. Such behavior may make her feel uncomfortable, and she may end up avoiding you altogether.

It is best to go with the flow to avoid such pitfalls. Approaching and starting a face-to-face conversation with a girl can be intimidating for many. Having a prior idea of what to say will help you relax. Here are some more tips to help you out.

Tips To Approach A Girl You Like For The First Time

Tips to approach a girl for the first time
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  • Introduce Yourself

Whenever you meet a new girl, introduce yourself to generate her interest. Start the conversation by telling her your name, interests, what you do, and so on. Sharing why you approached her specifically might intrigue her.

  • Give Her Compliments

Every girl loves compliments! However, you must be careful about being sincere and courteous, as strong remarks about anything might backfire. The best way is to compliment her smile, style, or her eyes and tell her how beautiful she is. Ensure to be respectful and keep it short, simple, and genuine without going overboard.

The idea here is to make her feel good and make a good impression. Going overboard or giving too many compliments might make you come across to her as desperate and creepy.

  • Ask For Her Suggestions
Ask for her suggestions while talking to a girl
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Asking her for guidance or a suggestion can be a great way to break the ice and approach her to make a conversation. This guidance or suggestion can be about anything common that connects you both.

For instance, if you have similar professions, you can ask for her suggestion for a project you might be handling. Likewise, if you both have common food interests, you can ask her to suggest the best eateries and restaurants to try.

  • Talk About An Upcoming Event

One of the other simple ways to approach a girl and start a conversation with her is by talking about an upcoming event you are looking forward to.

For instance, if a show is coming up in the city, you could say, “Hey, I am so excited about this show coming up this weekend. What are your plans?” Or, if there is a party coming up at a mutual friend’s place, you could ask, “Hey, are you coming for tonight’s party?” or “Hope to see you tonight at the party!”

protip_icon Did You Know?
Neil Papworth was the first person to send a text message on December 3, 1992. He utilized a personal computer to send the message “Merry Christmas”.
  • Say Things That Make Her Feel Relaxed 

When trying to talk to a girl, it is not enough to impress her. You should make her feel relaxed, safe, and comfortable in your company.

Among the things that you can say to her include, “I can totally relate to what you are saying” or “You can trust me, and all your secrets are safe with me.” Make her feel at home with you by relating to her goals and dreams.

Knowing how to talk to girls is not a trait that everyone possesses. If you struggle with talking to girls, you better learn how to do it. It is always better to keep things simple when you meet a girl for the first time. Ask how her day was and find out about her hobbies and interests to begin the conversation. Do not sound cheesy and desperate at any cost. Talk about things that interest her. Stay connected, but do not bombard her with texts every day. It is important to strike a healthy balance. Most importantly, present your real self and do not go for unnecessary boasting or flaunting.

Frequently Asked Questions

How can I impress a girl by talking?

The best way to impress a girl during a conversation is to be humble. This involves avoiding a few things. Here’s what you should do:
• Don’t be boastful because you don’t want to come off as a know-it-all or a show-off.
• Don’t dismiss her opinions. Instead, be a good listener.
• If you are trying to flirt with a girl, don’t be aggressive or forceful.

How do you talk to a girl if you are shy?

It can be hard to start a conversation with someone new if you are a shy person. The key is knowing you have nothing to lose. Either you speak to her and she will be interested in you, or she declines. Start off by introducing yourself to her, let her know why you want to speak to her (don’t be crass), ask her what she likes, and build a conversation from there. If it helps, have a friend start a conversation with both of you and give them a signal to move away once you are comfortable talking to the girl. Girls like honest people, so when you start a conversation with her, just let her know that you are shy.

What should be the first text to a girl?

Message the girl with your name and remind her where you met her and when she gave you her number. Let her know why you think she is great and that you would like to keep conversing with her and getting to know her better. Wait for her response. If she is interested, be yourself and keep talking to her. If she is not interested, leave her alone and move on.

Key Takeaways

  • Initiating a conversation with a girl may seem tricky, especially if you want to take things further.
  • Keeping it general about hobbies, interests, books, and movies may help break the ice.
  • Actively listening to her and responding with your honest thoughts is key to making it significant.
  • Staying in touch without overdoing it can help her ease into frequent chats, talks, and connecting more with you.

Master the art of confident communication with this guide on how to talk to girls. In this video, uncover effective tips, conversation starters, and body language cues to build rapport and create meaningful connections. Click play now!

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Ronald Hoang
Ronald HoangRelationship & Family Counselor
Ronald Hoang is a clinical counselor/psychotherapist based in Sydney, Australia, with close to a decade of experience. He graduated with a bachelor's degree in psychology from Macquarie University and a postgraduate degree in counseling from the Australian College of Applied Professions.

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